And they’re off! The contenders are picking up speed and setting the pace. Zehava Gal-On is coming in from the outside shooting ahead whining against the Netanyahu government blocking the borders against “peaceful” anarchists. And on her tail comes the Israeli leftist media crop sprinting into a gallop, no less weary yet very much wary of the efforts to bar from our country the Hamas backed European Jew haters. The track is dry and the hoof steps are breaking sand. But, oowah, look what we have here! Shalom Eisner coming up from the rear. It’s a whole new race now, folks. Take heart, ladies and gentlemen! This will be a race to remember!

And it’s Shalom Eisner, the Israeli Stallion, galloping in a three-beat gait — his performance, unyielding on behalf of the state, defending our land from foreign human rights activists who are anything but human rights activists.

Looks like Scandinavian Cycling Sam is no match for the Israeli Stallion. But here comes Psycho Dane on the outside, his tail waving Zahava Gal-On in the dust. She raises her mouth on the bit, but Psycho Dane pulls ahead. Gaining steadily, it’s Psycho Dane.

Yes, it’s Psycho Dane and the Israeli Stallion, neck and neck. This could be a blanket finish, but NO! Psycho Dane bolts uncontrollably, blowing the turn! The Israeli Stallion, unfettered, tears forward in smooth action.
Psycho Dane is no stud at all folks and no match for the Israeli Stallion — a thoroughbred. And here comes the rest of the crop — Heyday Hamas, Jumping Jihad and Radical Rage making a play for the homestretch.

But what’s this? Two other entries, Bouncing Bibi and Garish Gantz bolt ahead, one from the outside and the other from the inside. The Israeli Stallion is boxed in. Garish Gantz, galloping at a steady gait, jolts his mount and races to put his hoof forward. Like a knee jerk reflex, ladies and gentlemen, his gut sounds brazenly condemn the Israeli Stallion, and bucks him to rule him off before any other contender gains ground.

But wait! The Israeli Stallion holds his ground. He’s black class and has earned respect, but his chance for winning in the public eye is a longshot, folks, thanks to Bouncing Bibi who trumps right in, impulsively bridging the gap, slamming the Israeli Stallion before the final point of call of the placing judges. Bouncing Bibi − often graded as a false favorite − bolts to the left, to the right now, and back to the left. He’s at the head of the stretch! He crosses the line and, once again folks, it’s dead money on the Israeli Stallion.