So how’s the sleeping going? Not the morning, afternoon or evening nap in front of the TV set – anyone can do that. All you have to do is lie down on the couch, switch on the TV, close your eyes and you’re asleep. No big deal. This is a senior’s specialty. A tot of whiskey or some other lubricant will make this sleep even smoother.

 I’m asking you about the serious sleep, slumber, the one in the dark hours, the one where you prepare yourself; the warm shower, the toothbrush and the pajamas. This is the sleep that is going to get you through to tomorrow, so you go to a lot of trouble to make sure it’s going to be a great one. You lie down, close your eyes and… nothing happens. For half an hour, then an hour and then two hours and by then you are pretty sure it’s not going to happen at all.

What is it with us and sleep? Why, after years and years of perfect sleeping are we now confronted by sleepless nights? According to numerous articles on the internet, the sleep problem is common among older people for a variety of reasons, none of which apply to me.

What do you do? Steve tells me he goes and sits in front of the computer. I reckon that will wake up any part of him that did manage to doze off. Sam says he switches on the TV. Another mistake, I think. Have you seen the stuff they show at 3am? It’s designed to keep you awake – all blood, bullets and sex. I read, hoping that I will hit a boring patch in the book that will send me off. Oh, blessed sleep, where art thou?