I am mad as hell and I can’t take it any longer. I was never one to follow the crowds. If the crowd went one way I went the other. Today they call that “ oppositional disorder” yesterday they just called me a pain in the ass.
For the record I will not put a bucket of ice over my head for anybody except if it is really freaken hot outside okay !!! I know ALS is a terrible disease but I was never a Yankee fan anyway sorry Lou.
I don’t want to play candy crush, I am a diabetic so leave me alone.
No I don’t want to give to the charity of your choice at the check out line. I especially like to say that when there are people around looking at me to see what I am going to do.
When someone asks me at the grocery line “ did you find everything that you want” ? I usually tell them yes that is why I am checking out moron.
I refuse to say tall when the freaken cup of coffee is small. I want my coffee black. I don’t’ want chocolate, vanilla, sustainable cinnamon okay.
I don’t’ want gluten free .WHAT THE HELL IS GLUTEN ANYWAY ? In fact I want a 24 hour gluten restaurant nothing but gluten. I want to hear the guys at stadiums yelling GLLLLUTEN HERE , GET YOUR GLUTEN .
When I order a burger and a fry and a coke at a fast food place I don’t’ want to hear ( is there anything else ) ? Yes I want a side of beef okay? oh and a Lipitor.
When they look at me and say “do you have a kroger card” ? I say no even if I have one. I kinda feel like the Unabomber on that one. I want to be off the grid I don’t’ want someone, in some room somewhere, analyzing what I just ordered. Ok that is a bit paranoid ……. Shhhhhh
I don’t care if my meat came from a sustainable forest in fact cut all the forests down who needs them anyway. They are just full of bugs besides I am allergic to trees screw em.
Ok I am no curmudgeon I am too young for that but I am tired of being programmed like a robot to say and do what everyone in our “ collective “ says and does , so I am on strike. You say yes I say no. You say tomato I say f@#k you . Got it ?
So you are saying to yourself hey Lar who peed in your cheerios this morning . Well truth be told I have been waiting on my check from a long lost Uncle who is apparently royalty in Nigeria and it is very late.