My whole life I had never had a serious relationship. At the age of 33 I couldn’t help thinking that maybe it was time, actually I couldn’t help thinking that maybe the time had come and gone and that I had missed it.
I had been trying to find a serious girlfriend for years. I had been a member of J date on and off for more years than I can recount without losing whatever dignity I may have left. Though never had any of those dates really gone anywhere past the first month.
It got to the point where before every date I had to remind myself that I only needed it to work just one time for it to be worthwhile. I went through a period of fixing myself up with date after date after date on OKCupid all to no avail. The worst moments were the ones where I caught sight of my blind date for the first time and she was 10 years and 20 kilos heavier than her profile indicated. Then the dilemma, do I just run? She hasn’t seen me yet, I could do it…No of course not, I would go up to her and let the evening play out.
Always knowing nothing would happen.
I went through the dreadful, routine of graduating from sending a message, to chatting online, then adding her to Facebook to asking for her phone number, then calling and then finally, maybe, going on a date. Only to discover it had all been for nothing.
Which is why on the evening I spotted Gali online I sent her a message saying;
“Let’s not bother doing all of the messages and the Facebook and the phonecalls, let’s just meet up and see if it works. If it doesn’t we can call it quits after half an hour.”
She messaged me back;
“Sounds good to me”.
We did speak on the phone, once. I had two other dates that same week and both of them were washouts. I got home from work miserable at the prospect of yet another waste of time. With 45 minutes to go to our meeting I was asleep on the couch, my alarm woke me up with 10 minutes to go I considered cancelling at the last minute, (why not it was only going to be a waste of time anyway) the voice inside chimed in it only needs to work once!
There was just enough time to put on a splash of aftershave, change into a shirt and then out the door.
Of course she kept me waiting. Then she arrived, she looked exactly like her photo. In fact she looked better! Of course her first question was “what’s your longest relationship?” which had me shifting uneasily in my seat. When I told her I had never been in one she laughed at my honesty and said “who’s the more messed up you for never having been in one or me for being in two long term ones that didn’t work out?”
What a gal!
I can’t remember what else we spoke about that evening, I just remember that after two hours I didn’t want to stop talking to her. When she left me that night I counted the minutes until I could call her again.
I lasted 2 days.
That was 8 months ago. I broke up with her twice in that time as the dying single man inside rebelled against the new life I was sailing into. The first time I turned up on her doorstep in the middle of the night after 24 hours to beg for forgiveness. The second time it took me a week of living my old life to truly understand just how little I wanted to be without her.
She’s my forever Valentine and the proof that it only needs to work out once!