- If you’ve smoked in a prenatal unit.
- If you start honking before you pull out of a driveway…or begin a sentence (“Ehhh… Ehhh…”)
- If you wear too much cologne and not enough deodorant.
- If you’ve ever worked in the middle of a shopping mall, or tried to sell Dead Sea salts, steamers, or knockoff electronics.
- If you do something simply because it’s not allowed.
- If your medical care consists of the phrase, “Walk it off” or “b’seder”.
- If you’ve never parked legally.
- If your head is shaved and your chest is combed.
- If everyone else is an idiot.
- If you’ve ever screamed at a child that’s not yours, whose parents you don’t know.
- If you own a dog, and don’t own a leash.
- If you wear soccer jerseys at inappropriate moments, like weddings and job interviews.
- If you have strong opinions about things you’ve never heard of.
- If you’re not sure what those white dashes on the highway mean.
- If your approach to seduction is to shout, “Ehhhhhhh!”
- If 70% of your diet is made by Nestle.
- If you have no money, yet claim to be an investor.
- If you are currently traveling in South East Asia.
- If you are currently living in Miami… or anywhere but Israel.
- If you negotiate with ElAl flight attendants regarding critical safety measures (“It’s incredibly dangerous for you to stand there.” “Just one minute.”).
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ADD YOUR COMMENTS: What are other signs you’re an Israeli?