And it later came to pass that there were three boys who were going home from school, and there arose evil men who did take them prisoner and slew them. And the Nation of Israel arose in unity and did create a big hullabaloo, and they did search mightily and arrest many individuals who had committed crimes against them in the past. For they were of the tribe of Hamas, and their brothers in Gaza did shoot missiles all the time, but when they heard of their brothers’ imprisonment, they were angered and they did shoot more missiles than usual. And finally, they did find the corpses of the holy boys and the whole House of Israel did cry out in unity. Yet there were some subversives, of unsound mind, and they did not walk in the ways of the Lord and they did find and Arab boy and seized and burnt him alive. And the whole House of Israel did revile this act and felt ashamed.
All the while, missiles continued to be shot from Gaza, and the Children of Israel did ask politely for them to stop doing so, yet they continued. Many times did they entreat their neighbours to refrain from trying to slaughter them, yet their neighbours did not heed their calls. The People of Israel did cry out to their leaders, “Kindly stop the bombardments, for our shelters are cramped and stuffy.”
And the Leader was known as Bibi, and he did send forth the airforce to drop ordnance on those who would shoot missiles at the Jewish Nation. The number of missiles grew larger, for the Hamas and the Islamic Jihad were emboldened, and continued to shoot at them without respite.
And much ordnance did fall, but the Nation of Israel had gained no rest, and the tribe of Hamas did not cease for ceasefires, and they did place their own civilians in harm’s way, but the tribe of Hamas had constructed many tunnels and did think themselves safe. And their leaders had got themselves to Doha, and did stay in luxurious hotel suites, and did think themselves even safer.
The Nation of Israel realised that they would gain little from attacking the tribe of Hamas from the air, so they did send in their sons and daughters, and did discover many caves. And plots were discovered to slaughter the Nation of Israel through these caves.
Now at this time the minister, who served the Great Orator did feel that he needed to intervene, for he did declare that the ordnance fell too heavily. And he did gat himself to the Holy Land, and his chin did precede him on the way in, and many looked at his bouffant of hair and were struck with awe.
But he did not go and see the leaders of the Nation of Israel or the tribe of Hamas. He did not even go to see the leader of the Arabs of the West Bank, who were taking no part in the fighting. Instead, he did travel to the Land of the Pharaohs, to its capital. For the Leader of the Egyptian Nation hankered greatly after the destruction of the tribe of Hamas, for they had pained his country sorely. And he did propose an Egyptian initiative. For the new Pharaoh in Egypt had tried also to give peace to the people, but the tribe of Hamas had refused. And the minister did declare “Surely it is better that we return to the way things were before, but let the Nation of Israel be kinder to the tribe of Hamas, and let them have access to materials that they may use to slaughter the Nation of Israel.”to which the Tribe of Hamas did refuse to countenance, “How will we continue to resist without the ability to attack and restock our weapons. And behold, have we not trade agreements with Iran, Syria and North Korea to honour?”
And the man of Massachusetts did travel to the Land of Israel, although his country had banned its planes from travelling to the Holy Land, and did meet with Bibi and the leader of the Arabs of the West Bank, who were taking no part in the fighting. And the people were perplexed, and though they had been distracted by the immensity of the chin, they began to wonder if the minister quite knew what he was doing. Soon, the minister proposed terms of peace for the Nation of Israel and the tribe of Hamas, and the people were expectant, and hopeful.
But no success came of these plans, and the man from Massachusetts did retire to Paris, and he did meet other likeminded ministers from the European Continent. And behold, he did converse with the leader of the Turks and the Sheikh from the Kingdom of Qatar, and they did tunnel under the Egyptian initiative and propose an agreement much to the liking of the Tribe in Hamas, who did have the number of the Sheikh on speed-dial.
And the people were perplexed, and though they had been distracted by the immensity of the chin, they began to wonder if the minister quite knew what he was doing. Soon, the minister proposed terms of peace for the Nation of Israel and the tribe of Hamas, and the people were expectant, and hopeful.
And the leaders of the Nation of Israel were perplexed, and did immediately reject the proposal. But on this occasion, the Pharaoh in Egypt, and King Saud of Arabia, the leader of the West Bank Arabs, Father of Mazen and even, let it be said, the Turks in the North and the King across the Jordan and even the optometrist in Damascus and the Emperor and his viceroy in Persia were perplexed too, for they had all believed that the minister was in favour of the Nation of Israel’s survival. And they did laugh at him, saying, “Even we, who would destroy the nation of Israel would have offered them a better deal than this minister has done. Verily, there appears to be little grey matter between bouffant and chin.”
And the minister was ashamed, for he had abjectly failed, and he did slink away. Though he had succeeded in doing something which no other Secretary of State had ever done: uniting much of the Middle East against him and his nation, both Bibi and the Pharaoh, Mahmoud, Father of Mazen and the Jordanian King and even the House of Saud and many other sheikhs, a feat never achieved before and perhaps never again. And his chin did quiver as it preceded him out of the country.