Thus spake Samuel, who was not a prophet:

Then came Amalek and fought with Israel and they sought to attack the weak and injured and those who could not keep up. And Moses said unto Joshua, “Choose us out men, and go out, fight with Amalek: to morrow I will stand on the top of the hill with the rod of God in mine hand.”

So Joshua did as Moses had said to him, and fought with Amalek: and Moses, Aaron, and Hur went up to the top of the hill. And it came to pass, when Moses held up his hand, that Israel prevailed, and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed.

And Aaron and Hur stayed up his hands, the one on the one side, and the other on the other side. And from the people of Israel there came some, who wished not to live in the land, and who wished to serve the Lord in the wilderness outside the land which the Lord had sworn unto them and to which their brethren yearned to return. But they wished to resemble the nations of the earth, which did surround them. And they had taken not the sword unto Amalek.

They cried out to Aaron and Hur, saying “Cease from your holding up of this victory against Amalek! For what have Amalek done – are they not a nation just as we are a nation?” And they branded themselves by many names, ‘Students for Justice for Amalekites’ they were called, ‘Israelites for Peace’ they called themselves and ‘Open Hillel’ was also their name.

And the great mass of the nation of Israel called out to them and rebuked them, saying “Silence, children, you know not of that which you speak! For this people has come unto us for war, for slaughter they are come upon us. For verily, do they not spread the word amongst themselves, in their songs, and their poems and in the pyre on the mountaintop and the message on the wing of the bird and in every means of communication that the Lord have giveth unto man, and do they not teach it to their children as an inheritance, to hate and kill our brethren the Children of Israel?”

And the students and the Amalekites cried out in One Voice, and they shunned those who defended the Children of Israel, and they said “Nay, for we have made a forum for students alone, and it shall verily be a safe place for them to share their feelings.”

And the students created much noise, and the people were distracted from their war with Amalek. And Aaron and Hur knew not what to do, and turned around, and they held up the hands of Moses not.

And the Lord was incensed, and turned his countenance from the children of Israel, and verily, Amalek fell upon them with terrible might.

Lo, and Moses held up the rod of the Lord on his own, and he cried out in a terrible voice to the children of Israel: “Heed the cry of war that comes from Amalek! For it is true that the Lord hath made them a nation, a nation that hath sworn to kill us and no amount of student politicking will turn them asunder.”

And Moses turned to the students, and he said “Dost thou believe that if we turn off from war with Amalek, Amalek will let you live? Didst they not come upon us for war, and not for peace?”

And thus broketh away the students from the congregation of Israel, for they had forsaken their people and their Lord for another nation, who had come to put their brothers to the sword. But Moses kept his hands aloft, and Aharon and Hur supported him, and the Children of Israel were victorious, but the students were not remembered, and they ended in the wilderness, and did not enter the Land which the Lord had sworn unto their forefathers.