A Modern Midrash To Begin The Year
I am in the process of preparing for my modern midrash class which begins next week. I reread the very first midrash I ever wrote and was struck by the opening lines concerning the expulsion of Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. Considering that the “gardens of Eden” in both the South and North of Israel have been evacuated and people are homeless for indefinite time periods, through no faults of their own, I wonder if the idea of getting another chance, of turning back the calendar is wishful thinking. When this war is over–and right now, the big question is of course when will it end–there will be a lot of rebuilding to do; not to speak of mending our fences with our neighbors–assuming that it is a possibility. So with this in mind, read this modern midrash entitled “Beginnings” that I wrote in October, 1985–almost forty years ago. It appears in my collection S/He Created Them: Feminist Retellings of Biblical Tales.
BEGINNINGS
“Give us another chance. Let us back in. We’ll be good. We won’t do it again. Oh please, let us back in, please!”
The hapless couple stood outside the Garden of Eden wringing their hands, beseeching the angels.
“We have nowhere to go, no plans. Please let us in,” they implored.
They pleaded with the guards. Surely if they cried enough someone would take pity on them and let them return.
But their entreaties were in vain. The angels remained stiffly unmoving at their stations, swords in front of them. They had a job to do. They had their orders. No one was to be let through.
Eve and Adam finally gave up and started to walk away sadly from the Garden of Eden. Adam bitterly regretted that his need for another human being had led to this. If only she had not been created! Because of her I have been punished and have lost my home.”
Aloud he said, “It’s all your fault! Do something to get us out of this!”
Eve thought, the greatest punishment is to have to hear his complaining.
Aloud she said, “Let’s walk until we get tired and then rest under a tree.”
When they reached a stream beside a grove of trees, they stopped and refreshed themselves by drinking from a stream. They ate some figs, which they had salvaged from Eden, and rested.
They felt better when they awoke. Eve wanted to go back and reason with the angels.
“Perhaps if we behave with more dignity this time, they will give us another chance. Let’s try! Maybe there is a second entrance.”
Adam, however, had resigned himself to the new reality and argued convincingly against her.
“I think we are expected to make it on our own from here on, without outside help. Let’s try to work together, to re-create an acceptable kind of life.”
Eve reluctantly agreed. “We must try to create a new life in the image of our old one. It won’t be easy since our life in Eden was idyllic, but I won’t be able to go on if we don’t at least try. I must have a future to look forward to.”
Privately, Adam thought it an impossible task. But what harm could it possibly do for Eve to dream? If she were happy, their life together would be more pleasant.
They began looking for a suitable site on which to build a home. Each time Adam thought he had found the place, Eve noticed some minor imperfection and refused to remain. After some months of wandering, however, she began to tire easily as her body became gross and clumsy. She appeared willing to compromise and Adam took advantage of this one afternoon, when they wandered into a shaded arbor with a source of water, animals, and lush vegetation.
“We are staying here,” he said forcefully.
Surprisingly, Eve agreed without argument. Within a short time, they had built a rough house with mud and twigs and discovered which plants were edible. They learned to hunt and use animal skins for clothing. After several months Eve thought that maybe this new life would not be so bad after all.
She woke up early one morning with piercing pains in her lower back. As they got more frequent and closer together, she cried out and shook Adam, disturbing his sound sleep.
“Adam, wake up! It hurts! Help me. I can’t bear the pain!”
He noticed there was a rhythm to her pain and tried to comfort her. “Don’t worry, it will get better. I’ll help you. Try to push with the pain. Don’t fight it. See if that helps.”
Finally, with a terrible tear and a shriek, a baby was born. Instinctively, they both recognized what it was and what had to be done to take care of it.
“I’ve earned this. It is mine,” Eve proclaimed. “With my suffering I’ve paid for whatever wrong I’ve done.”
She named the baby “Cain” (I bought it), and vowed she would never willingly suffer such agony again. But she quickly forgot the birth experience for she had to cope with the daily demands made by the new baby.
He was not an easy child. He cried a lot, and so did she. He was often sick, did not digest his food well and the smell of blood upset him. She discovered that singing to him and telling him stories calmed him.
She tried very hard to do what was expected, but it wasn’t easy. Adam was no help for he blamed the existence of the child on her. His primary connection to their family unit was to provide them with food and shelter.
Adam’s attitude annoyed Eve less as Cain grew older. She was very attached to the boy. She told him stories about the Garden of Eden, telling him that it was like Paradise.
“Where’s Paradise?” Cain asked.
“It’s a far away place where one day you and I will go, and if Father wants, he can come too. We spoke a special language which the animals understood. We didn’t have to worry about foraging for food. All we had to do was sit under the trees and command the fruit to drop into our hand.”
“Why did you leave such a wonderful place?” Cain asked.
“I’ll tell you when you are older,” she answered.
Eve was uncertain why they had been driven out. Surely the fruit which she had eaten wasn’t a good enough reason. It must have been something Adam had done. The proof was that he was the one who was punished daily much more than she was. Look how hard he has to work in this new world. Her life wasn’t so bad, for she had Cain to keep her company.
She and Adam argued a lot. “Why do I have to work to create a new Eden for you? You don’t do anything except spend time with the boy. When I return you don’t even have a fire going with hot food ready for me. I have to do everything myself.”
She used Cain as her excuse. “I was so busy with him today. We looked for some goats in order to get milk. When we finished, we rested in the woods. We just got back.”
Eve would tell Adam how busy she was teaching Cain the names of plants which were safe to eat. Adam realized that she was very good at keeping the child busy, but she was having fun while he was doing real work.
All this changed when their next son was born. This time Adam was ready for the responsibilities of fatherhood. He welcomed the infant with open arms. He even chose his name. He called him Hevel (vanity), an indirect comment on his wife’s vain hopes of finding her way back to Eden. Now with a second child, she would be too busy to dream.
This was true for a while. She was exhausted. Cain cried vainly for attention. He hated this new brother who took his mother away from him and when she wasn’t looking, would pinch him. This would make the baby cry and then his mother would pay even more attention to Hevel, so he learned not to do that. He missed the old story times and the loving attention. Eve felt badly about Cain’s unhappiness and promised she would find time alone with him, but she never did. Cain felt deserted. He hid his feelings, but never forgave his mother for abandoning him to take care of Hevel.
The children grew up and became independent. Cain took Hevel to explore their surroundings. While they were gone Eve had time for herself. She often thought about the Garden of Eden. She felt that she had been forced out of a life of luxury and now was doomed to continue as the servant of two sons and a husband. She had no real purpose in life. Cain seemed to need her, even though he tried to pretend that he did not. I must find some time to spend with him.
One fine morning, she watched the boys through the opening of their house.
Look at them! Cain’s leading as usual. I wonder what they are doing. They look so intense. I hope they don’t get into trouble. Sometimes Cain is so mean to Hevel.
She saw Cain signal Hevel to follow him. Cain took some cornmeal and Hevel took his pet sheep, the one he had raised himself. She wondered where they were going, but decided not to worry.
Oh, it’s going to be so much easier, now that they’re not dependent on me. I won’t have to decide who is right in their endless disputes. She had never realized how draining it was to have more than one child. Fortunately, they are almost mature. Soon we can all spend time together as a happy family.
In her day-dreaming, she didn’t notice that the sky was now overcast with dark threatening clouds. Adam rushed home to avoid the downpour.
“Where are the two boys?” he asked.
“They went off in the direction of the mountain,” Eve answered.
“How could you let them go in this weather?”
“It was beautiful this morning.”
“And you let Hevel go with Cain! You know how rough Cain is when the two of them are alone.”
“I thought it would be good for them to spend some time together. They have to be friends.”
“Well, I’m going to search for them. I hope nothing’s happened to Hevel.”
“Hevel, Hevel. That’s all I ever hear from you.”
“What about you and your precious Cain? Ever since he was born, you had no time for me. I kill myself so you can pretend you are still in Eden and what thanks do I get for that!”
The battle of words only ceased when Adam strode off to search for his sons.
By night time the three of them had not returned. It was raining hard. Eve assumed that the three must have found shelter for the night. Her primary concern was for Cain. Adam would no doubt punish him severely for having disappeared with Hevel.
In the morning, Adam came back alone, soaked through and visibly upset.
“I searched all night for them. I looked in every cave, in every possible shelter. I don’t know where they’ve gone to. They’ve both disappeared off the face of this earth,” he sobbed.
Moaning, he tore his hair, rent his damp clothes and smeared them with ashes. With watery eyes he lowered himself to the ground to lament his favorite son, Hevel.
Eve sat hugging her body, rocking back and forth, keening to herself.
“I am alone. My children have left me! What has become of my first-born son? What will I do without Cain? Oh, the pain and torment of bringing him into this world! How will I ever get back to Eden, alone, without his help?”
She was bereft and tired of life. If only she could persuade Adam to return to Eden. Then she would have a reason to live.
But he was adamant about not leaving. He was comfortable here. He blamed her for the loss of their sons. He clung to the belief that if they stayed here their sons would know where to find them on the day they came back. She, however, had no illusions about their return. They were gone forever.
She knew that without Adam’s cooperation she would not search for Eden. She was slowing down. She had no reason to get up in the morning. All day she would lie on her pallet, scheming how to get to Eden, but she lacked the will to proceed. She wanted the good things in life served to her, without having to work for them.
Adam had no sympathy for her. He had faced reality long ago, the day they had left Eden; he had accepted the fact that life was hard. He had put Eden behind him, fathered a family, and never looked back. Why can’t she do the same? If only she would consider having another child. Perhaps that will give her a sense of purpose? Make her young again. Adam was confident of almost everything, yet unsure of this.
Can I let the world end with us? I need a son to keep me company in my old age. But if we have another child and she neglects him? Or worse, if she spoils him and he turns out to be another Cain? I won’t know if I don’t try! Will I? What if she rejects my advances? I will have to risk that, won’t I? With that, he pushed aside the curtain separating her area from his.
POSTCRIPT
We know of course that Adam and Eve had another child, Seth, and then a grandchild Enosh, who offered humanity a chance to begin again, to reboot as it were: