Boycotting Boycotters – The App

It’s a genius plan. Evil and crafty. But it’s a winner. And had I not been inspired by my Facebook news feed I would have to give the credit to no one at all. Which is its brilliance.

The downside is that my Facebook inspired plan, if successful, might well reduce global economics to its knees and send us right back to the barter system – but then, who wouldn’t want to exchange a beautifully worded Thank You Note (because that’s pretty much all I have to offer) for half a dozen eggs and a litre of unpasteurised milk?

According to my Facebook stream, which I take very seriously (aside from “Jews News” – who make me feel click-baited every time I succumb to a click bait headline) there is a growing list of people who are currently boycotting something and of those who demand to be boycotted. It’s potentially very confusing. Very. And making the wrong decision could not only place one on the wrong side of a political storm, but could well result in one losing 20 – 25 Facebook friends in the time it takes to hit refresh. And no one wants that.

As is the case in many ideological battles, Israel seems to find itself at the centre of this storm. Ground zero so speak. The BDS have been at it for years – boycotting anything that they don’t need and that might be Israel connected. Deeply committed they are to their hypocritical boycott system, that multiple bodies have finally made a decision to boycott the boycotters right back. All whilst proclaiming that boycotts don’t work. And shouting, “but they started it!”  And proving that boycotts never solved a problem that Wonder Woman couldn’t sort.

And then – just as we thought we had it all covered (kind of), the Egalitarians and the Haredim decided to shatter the myth of Jewish cohesiveness and, wait for it, launch yet another boycott campaign. The ultra Orthodox threatened to boycott government and walk out of the coalition whilst secular American Jewry responded by freezing funds that would ordinarily send to Israel. Seriously? And the simple “Thank you note” writers are meant to keep up to date with this? I have enough trouble trying to not be lured into clicking on a “Jews News” article, deciding what is real news versus fake and what is a repost from sometime in the early 90’s (and not current news) without trying to figure out what side of the boycott fence I stand on. It’s all a bit much.

I tried creating an Excel Spreadsheet. It’s a Microsoft product and no one boycotts them (as far as I know) but it didn’t help. Even they don’t allow enough columns for nuances and comments.

And that’s when I had the idea. It’s a Boycott App. A simple one step Apple and Android Friendly App that allows you to input the product, service or political party in question it will neatly align it with your very own and limited ideological viewpoint. It will even block out counter opinions so that you never need to be faced with uncomfortable facts that might (God forbid) get in the way of your narrative.

If you want to upgrade to the professional version (for a very reasonable USD1.99 per month) you will receive the add-on functionality that tracks not only your list of boycotts but also those of “Friends” in your boycott community. Because no one wants to be seen boycotting alone. What would be the point?

The business case risk is both the low barrier to entry as well as the fact that the App might well become the subject of the very people who are its target market. The comfort being that if they do choose to boycott it, they will still need a place to document it.

We are told over and over again to vote with our feet. And it makes sense. But I can’t imagine that using our brains would do us any harm.