The below I wrote with some trepidation. It’s a sensitive topic, especially for victims of sexual abuse, the victims in this case, and their close ones.
It’s also not my intention to lecture someone on the brink of his death.
But I just wanted to communicate: there is hardly ever sufficient reason for suicide. It’s often done in panic. Take your time until you see the light at the end of the tunnel again. There’s no solid proof that ‘now all is lost.’
There are now claims that the letter I’ll write about below is a forgery. I don’t know if it is or isn’t. But it sounds pretty darn authentic, IMHO. Whether that is true or not, however, doesn’t influence the ideas I share.
A famous well-doer became an accused serial rapist of decades. A few months later, he tried to end his life and left a suicide note. The police confiscated it, but a photograph reveals its content. This is so much better than just not wanting to face the bad, one has done. He wrote:
“I am sorry.
My punishment I have received already.
Try to remember the good that I did;
try to always remember what I forgot: ‘There is an Eye that sees, an Ear that hears, and all your deeds are written in a Book.’
My love always,
and I am very embarrassed,
He expressed regret and feeling terrible about what he did. He admits, though not in detail. He is ready to tell the world: Don’t do as me. He maintains he’s not all-evil – he did good things too.
What was missing are his direct apologies to his victims and his intention to pay them compensation though no amount can be enough and it’s doubtful he will have enough to pay all victims for their therapies at least.
But what a difference with (even convicted) crooks who won’t admit, who shrink the damage they caused, and only focus on their own pain.
Suicide here too is unnecessary. After the above, he can live with his head held high, as an advocate against sexual predators and helping naive and powerless victims and bystanders. There is dignity for any true repentant.
I hope he will completely recover and be able to complete his new urgent role in the universe: defending and preventing (potential) victims of sexual abuse and opening the eyes of all abusers to stop immediately.
Though my first prayers go to the victims, by necessity.