I will continue to lust for Scarlett

There’s been a lot of attention given to the announcement that actress Scarlett Johansson will appear in an advertisement for SodaStream during the Super Bowl.

Scarlett has been the target of criticism for serving as a presenter of an Israeli company that operates in the West Bank, implying that she supports Israel’s policies in the territories.

In response to the criticism, Scarlett issued a statement saying that she remains “a supporter of economic cooperation and social interaction between a democratic Israel and Palestine. SodaStream is a company that is not only committed to the environment but to building a bridge to peace between Israel and Palestine, supporting neighbors working alongside each other, receiving equal pay, equal benefits and equal rights. That is what is happening in their Ma’ale Adumim factory every working day.”

According to media reports, 900 Palestinians are employed in the factory. In a December 2012 video, SodaStream’s CEO Daniel Birnbaum said, “We give them an opportunity to not only have a job and health insurance, but also social benefits and a very high pay scale which they could never achieve in the West Bank.”

The Electronic Intifada website accused the video of “lies” and included an interview with an unidentified employee at the factory who said, “I feel humiliated and I am also disgraced as a Palestinian, as the claims in this video are all lies. We Palestinian workers in this factory always feel like we are enslaved.”

If things are so bad, can’t this employee just quit his job?

I, for my part, will most definitely not be drinking SodaStream’s products, but that’s only because I don’t like carbonated beverages. In the planned Super Bowl advertisement, Scarlett says, “Sorry Coke and Pepsi,” which apparently could get the entire ad disqualified. I would state, instead, “Sorry Coke, Pepsi, and SodaStream,” because I don’t like soft drinks with bubbles.

On the other hand, I will continue to lust for Scarlett, probably the sexiest woman on the face of the planet. In particular I lust for her voice, and I say that especially after having seen, or rather heard, her seductive voice-only role in the movie “Her”.

Scarlett, I wish you were the voice of my computer’s operating system. I would certainly drink to that!

About the Author
Ellis Shuman made aliya to Jerusalem as a teenager, served in the IDF, was a founding member of a kibbutz, and now lives on Moshav Neve Ilan. Ellis is the author of ‘The Burgas Affair’ – a crime thriller set in Israel and Bulgaria; ‘Valley of Thracians’ - a suspense novel set in Bulgaria; and 'The Virtual Kibbutz' - a collection of short stories. His writing has appeared in The Times of Israel, The Huffington Post, The Jerusalem Post, Israel Insider, and on a wide range of Internet websites. Ellis lived with his wife for two years in Bulgaria, and blogs regularly about Israel, Bulgaria, books, and writing.