Transitioning is changing one’s body’s appearance to resemble one’s gender. It is reported widely that 1% of those who transition will have regrets. Sometimes, people assume the following troublesome things.
1. What’s 1% of unhappy people on 99% of those pleased? Well, hundreds of thousands of people, actually. That’s more than a neglectable few.
2. It’s faulty statistics to compare the 1% regretful to the 99% pleased transitioners. We should compare those who regret transitioning (over x years) to trans genders who regret not transitioning (over x years).
3. Transitioning is a gradual process, often not taken all the way to the end. If one took hormones for two years and then quit them, is that detransitioning or not? If one had top surgery and then wants breast implants, is that the same as regretting bottom surgery?
4. Regret is not a black-or-white thing. There are a lot of grays. One could regret poorer health but enjoy being recognized for one’s gender identity. One could regret the body change but enjoy what it has taught one. Etc.
5. Irreversibility. Bottom surgery’s kind of permanent, but the rest is not. Not having transitioned is irretrievable too as no one can give you back the years lost. But much of it is reversible, and much drama and hype are just bigoted attempts to manipulate us into reactionary horror and revulsion.
6. For a cis person, a sex change would be horrifying. But that should not be projected onto someone who has gender dysphoria. Just like a straight person might be revolted at the idea of same-sex sex and a gay person at other-sex sex. That doesn’t mean that people in the other cohort do something revolting when they follow their natural preference.
7. Is going from cis to (partly) trans, and then on to (partly) cis a matter of going back or forward? Were the trans years lost, or did they enrich one? A detransitioning community is now forming. They probably still are part of LGBTQAI+. Compare groups of ex-ex-gays: people talked/coerced out of being gay, only to rediscover themselves later. But, that detour always was caused by intimidation and fraud. It was traumatic and should never have happened, though one can grow from that too. And have children, though they too will be traumatized by the inevitable divorce. (Obscured by the fact that a terribly high percentage of cis straights divorce anyway.) In contrast, a need for detransitioning doesn’t always need to be sad. But, as with much of trans life, it is all highly individual, so let’s not generalize.
In any case, it will get better. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.