Life is What You Make of It

Sefer Devarim is winding to a close and so, too, is the life of Moshe. In the Jewish tradition, even the greatest of heroes remains human, finite and ephemeral:

The Lord said to Moshe: Your days are drawing near [for you] to die… (Deuteronomy 31:14)

The rabbinic tradition, forever alerted to when Scripture expresses itself in an unusual way, saw just such an instance in God’s unusual manner of expressing to Moshe of his impending death. Why did God say to Moshe that his days were drawing to an end, rather than telling him he was about to die? This question inspired the author of the following midrash to take up a discussion of the existential anxiety and insecurity faced by all human beings over the discomfort we feel over our lack of ownership of when our lives will end:

Our Rabbis said: A story about Rabbi Shimon ben Ḥalafta, who went to a brit (circumcision). He feasted there and the father of the infant gave the guests to drink wine that was aged seven years. He said to them: ‘From this wine I am aging for the wedding feast of my son.’ They were feasting until midnight. Rabbi Shimon ben Ḥalafta, who was confident in his strength, departed at midnight to go to his city. He encountered there the angel of death on the way. He saw him laugh. He said to him: ‘Who are you?’ He said to him: ‘the messenger of the Holy One Blessed be He.’ He said to him: ‘Why are you laughing?’ He said to him: ‘On account of the conversation of the people, who say: This and that we intend to do in the future, but they do not know when he will be called [to die]. That man (the father of the baby), who said [to you]: From this wine which I am aging for the wedding of my son; the time for the infant to be taken will be reached after thirty days.’ Rabbi Shimon said to him: ‘Show me my time.’ The messenger replied to him: ‘I do not have control over you, and over those like you. At times, the Holy One blessed be He desires your good deeds and adds life to you… Know that He should have said to Moses: “Behold, you are going to die,” but He did not say so. Instead, He forsook him and attributed his death to the days. From where is it derived? It is from what we read regarding the matter: “Behold, your days are approaching to die.” (Adapted from Devarim Rabbah 9:1)

This story is filled with both paradox and irony. The human beings in this story act innocently, living their lives, unaware of what is in store for them. They laugh and rejoice and go about their lives. Rabbi Shimon celebrates with them and then ventures out, late at night, seemingly ignoring the danger of such an act and happens upon the Angel of Death. He finds the Angel (agent) laughing and asks him both who he is and why he is laughing. The Angel replies because the people at the brit – a simkha (a rejoicing) are unaware of the sad future of the baby. Rabbi Shimon asks boldly if he might know his own future and is denied the knowledge. And this is the irony! Rabbi Shimon wants to know but said knowledge would destroy the possibility of making life significant because all human actions would then become scripted, the actors incapable of independent action. The angel only hints at one thing. Good deeds count! Sometimes, not knowing is a gift.  (See Y. Frankel, Iyunim B olamo Hayehudi Shel Sippur Ha’agadah, p. 42-44)

This same fate awaits all of us, Moshe included. He, too, lived and flourished by these same rules, for it is what gives us the maximum ability to make for ourselves meaningful lives.