Loaded with Meanings

Israeli, American, about my age. I identified closely with Keith during his 484 days in Hamas captivity from October 7. Time management and schedules on Thursday before the Habima Square demonstration for democracy led us to Keith Siegel’s pop-up pancake place at Sarona Market in Tel Aviv.

Pop-up reminder: the government of Israel relinquishes responsibility for returning hostages, for their rehabilitation, for rebuilding destroyed kibbutzim. Proceeds from the pancake pop-up will go to restoring the Siegel’s lives, home, wellbeing, like initiatives and crowdfunding campaigns by other October 7 survivors and freed hostages.

The government chooses war, subjecting remaining hostages to torture according to freed hostages’ reports, Eli Sharabi’s interview a case in point. The government of Israel prioritizes steps to trample and squash the judicial system, disabling mechanisms to interfere with appointments of its yes-men to lead defense and security institutions.

The government of Israel finds greater justification for war than releasing hostages from Gaza. IDF reserve soldiers expected to report for duty in the months ahead. The government of Israel maintains its stability, overruling bills calling for recruitment of Haredi [ultra-Orthodox] men for military service required of other Jewish citizens. Extensive military service, its economic implications, its toll on family life – and the loss of lives – a burden not shared  by Haredi society, with an estimated 70,000 men eligible for draft.

Eroding the fiber of Israeli society. Imminence of civil war – discourse normalized in daily media commentary. Like bait for our enemies. Preoccupied by domestic division, many first responses to October 7 were sporadic, heroic, individual initiatives, in the absence of immediate institutional orders.

After finishing Keith Siegel’s pancake and the strawberry slices on the plate, of course, yours truly fought tears. As he stepped outside, we exchanged a few words with him. He needed a rest from hours of approaching strangers, selfies, Israelis embracing him as one of too many symbols of too many issues.

An uneventful walk to Habima along streets named for biblical personalities, medieval Jewish poets, and modern Zionist leaders. Pop-up: if we are to be worthy of walking such streets, we need to be at Habima.

Before the lineup of speakers in front of an estimated 50,000 demonstrators, complementing larger demonstrations throughout the week in Jerusalem, there was a security announcement. If sirens warn of an air-raid attack during the demonstration, the crowd is asked to sit down in the concrete Square for ten minutes – standard wait from siren activation until leaving a safe space.

A vast range of civil society initiatives were represented, with messages spanning the sociopolitical spectrum, all demanding independence of the judicial system, and professionalism, vs. politicization of Israel’s security and defense services.

One group’s sticker came our way: Refuse War. In small print, organizational name and logo: Looking the Occupation in the Eye.

Stuck the sticker to my t-shirt, gazing in disbelief as Haim did the same. His double-edged response: “We have to do something different than what we’ve been doing until now. Don’t post my picture with the sticker.”

Refuse War? To any Israeli, that means refuse to enlist. For most Israelis that’s considered a luxury we can’t afford. Yet, our government sends soldiers to war, risks their lives, endangers Israeli hostages, legitimates extremist plans for Israeli settlement of Gaza, southern Lebanon, disregarding illegal settler actions in the West Bank. Our government relieves Haredi society of the duty to serve. Our government allows them to refuse war. Our government is stripping our democracy of its fiber.

However, there are soldiers in the field. Our son-in-law is on reserve duty in that moment. We can’t weaken our support or contribute to demoralizing their spirit. This week, we were attacked from Lebanon, Gaza, and Yemen. We aren’t posting a call to refuse war. We wear the sticker because we must find an alternative.

Speeches began at the demonstration amidst the sea of Israeli flags waved by people of all ages. The words resonated from the microphone: “Democracy – a Jewish and democratic State of Israel.” That’s why we were there.

Yet, my lips pursed. As a child, my dream was to live those words. As a child in the US, aware of my minority status, Jewish, in a majority Christian society, I believed in democratic mechanisms for fighting discrimination, promoting equality, and designing public space that welcomes diversity. I would not want to be the loyal Arab, Palestinian citizen of Israel hearing Israel must be a “Jewish and democratic” state. Committed to shared society, still, I feel guilt-ridden. Struggling. I am the privileged in this.

Refuse war? Loaded with meanings.

Wearing stickers. Posting pictures – when you do, and when you don’t.

Harriet Gimpel, March 29, 2025