Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews

Men are not the victims of the #MeToo movement

It is not unusual for perpetrators to turn the world upside-down and claim that they are the real victims. So there is nothing unusual in a leading opinion maker (a man) claiming in a formerly respectable newspaper that the essence of the #MeToo movement is harassment of all decent men. But we must speak up every time comfortable men try to beat back into the corner the women fighting for a safer world for all women. Now too.

I want to mention for a moment that the heydays of the US #MeToo movement were preceded by the fight (and success) for marriage equality and followed by the strongest awakening ever of Black Lives Matter.

These things don’t happen in a vacuum. I find the sequence interesting.

I’m not going to discuss the opinion maker or even the person he’s defending against what he deems weak accusations. Rather, I’m going to hold to the light and dissect what I consider his abject arguments.

  1. He writes about “the ordeal endured by US Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh when the #MeToo movement attempted to smear him over alleged sexual assault charges.”

This Kavanaugh was not accused by any movement. I’ve heard the testimony of the only witness allowed to speak. For me as a therapist, it was clear as crystal that she was telling the truth and the accused not–with his fake anger, no different from the outburst of our former president who eventually was convicted of sexual assault. Many viewers seemed to have had the same impression.

But to portray her story as an “#MeToo movement attempted to smear” is no different from a convicted anti-Semite saying that “World Jewry” has done him in. Accusations of anti-Semitism are often framed by anti-Semites as an attack by the Jews.

  1. The “Senate hearing, which made McCarthyism pale in comparison.”

The scale of the false accusations and the penalties in the hunt for communists in the US were horrendous and people were even executed. How many men did get the death penalty from (false or true) accusations by the #MeToo movement? NB: The very Harvey Weinstein around whom the #MeToo movement exploded is still not locked up for life.

  1. In “today’s insane climate, it would only take one woman to go to the media and accuse me of sexual misconduct. She would soon be joined by others and #MeToo supporters baying for my blood.”

First of all, it is a known form of sexism to accuse women of hysteria, insanity. No different from accusing Jews of being liars and thieves.

Then, not every man is now in danger of being falsely accused. Maybe in a divorce procedure. But I don’t know ONE man accuse or brought to trial for sexual assault who didn’t harm a fly while I know so many women who were sexually assaulted and did not tell anyone, did not go to the police, or if they did, saw their cases closed, or, if it came to trial, saw, if it came to a conviction at all, ridiculous punishments. Victims traumatized for years, often decades, perpetrators getting two months in jail. Totally absurd.

Women’s blood is spilled by the truckloads but the author wants sympathy for the blood spilled of men falsely accused. Clearly, men are not falsely convicted in any proportion to the unpunished assault on women.

And if you keep Jewish Law, and never seclude yourself with a woman, you have nothing to fear even from vindictive women. Often sex abusers claim that all men are on trial now. May I point out that that is simply untrue.

  1. “Unfortunately, there are, of course, sexual predators who should have been dealt with long ago, and for that reason, initially I considered the #MeToo movement a highly overdue effort to stamp out these abominations.”

Women are victimized in every country at every minute of the day. To claim that this is something of the past should be a crime in itself. (Just think how many women are cruelly reminded of their victimization by the alleged Eilat gang rape. Women to whom it happened a decade ago, a year ago, a month ago, a week ago, yesterday.) It’s like saying, the Holocaust is over and when do Jews finally stop whining about their victimhood?!

  1. For me it’s obvious (I could be mistaken) that Dershowitz is falsely accused of sexual assault of a minor. But look at how this opinion leader builds his case. Dershowitz is very respectable, did great things, but defended Trump and Epstein so now the media convict him Just like Kavanaugh.

Not at all. Dershowitz was not made to face the accuser on TV. Where is the comparison?

More importantly, how estimable Dershowitz was or is, is totally irrelevant. Bill Crosby was very meritorious. That does not imply his innocence in accusations of being a serial rapist. Jerry Sandusky was practically a saint. He founded a non-profit charity serving underprivileged and at-risk youth and arranged foster care. But some became his victims. Hundreds can vouch for being saved by him but dozens that he raped them, typically boys without a father at home, when they were 8–12 years old. He was found guilty of 45 counts of sexual abuse. All the good he did, did not erase the monster he was to dozens. Same in the case of Michael Jackson, who died before most of his victims finally dared to speak up.

But the worst point of this whole opinion piece is the following, I believe. I also think that the case against Dershowitz is weak if at all existing. But this opinion leader is using that innocence to discredit the whole #MeToo movement. If one Jew is a thief, all Jews are thieves. If one woman falsely accuses, all men are in danger of having their innocent blood spilled.

***

Again, my whole aim here was to show the sexism and suggest arguments against this kind of hatred for women. Because there is no middle ground. Either you are an ally to women or you are part of the problem.

About the Author
MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (https://diethylstilbestrol.co.uk/studies/des-and-psychological-health/), born in 1953 to two Dutch survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork, and holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam). He taught Re-evaluation Co-counseling, became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His most influential teachers (chronologically) are: his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim: Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. * Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he wrote hasbara for the Dutch public. His fields of attention now are varied: Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (statistics), Politics (Israel, the US and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight Truth), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), Ecology and Veganism. Sometimes he's misunderstood because he has such a wide vision that never fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what many love about him. Many of his posts relate to affairs from the news or the Torah Portion of the Week or are new insights that suddenly befell him. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, reassure the doubters but make the self-assured doubt more. He strives to bring a fresh perspective rather than bore you with the obvious. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds must be disputed. In short, his main political positions are: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, democracy, anti the fake peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, Science, Free Will, anti blaming-the-victim and for down-to-earth optimism. Read his blog how he attempts to bridge any discrepancies. He admits sometimes exaggerating to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. November 13, 2018, he published his 500th blog post with the ToI. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having a peek outside of your cultural bubble. * NEW: To see other blog posts by him, his overspill blog you can reach by clicking on the Website icon next to his picture at the head of every post. There you may find precursors to later TOI blog posts, addition or corrections of published TOI blog posts, blog posts the TOI will not carry, and some thoughts that are too short to be a TOI blog post. Also, the TOI only allows for one blog post per blogger per 24 hours. Sometimes, he has more to say than that. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me.
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