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Yasha Harari
Artistic Internet visionary, marketing pioneer, crypto editorial cartoonist

My apology to Hamas

I’m sorry, Gaza

aka: Things I am so ashamed of in the Israel-Hamas rocket war

Iron Dome and terror rocket caricature
Rocket vs Iron Dome

It occurred to me that during this now weeklong war between Israel and Hamas, that what the uninformed, outside world wants to know, is how real people in Israel feel about the situation, and what Hamas wants to hear is an unconditional apology from the evil forces of Zion, who relentlessly pursue that most offensive crime, the right to exist.

If I could, I would issue a grand apology to Hamas and the other Palestinian extremists, as well as to the rest of the world that supports those groups against Israel. I would like to say how very sorry I am that we in Israel are alive and well, despite all attempts by Hamas to terrorize and kill us, and replace the relatively democratic State with a full-on Islamist nation of bloodthirsty killers who lie and kill ad nauseum in their efforts to change the reality on the ground, and rewrite the history of this land.

So here goes.

For more funny editorial caricatures and jokes, go to Laughzilla

Dear World,

I apologize for living in a state that generally respects human rights for all people, regardless of race, gender, religion, politics or sexual orientation.

I apologize for being fortunate enough to live in a country that has an army strong enough to defend its territory.

I am sorry that our army having the moral fortitude to do what no other armed force in the history of mankind has ever done, by giving fair warning to the mortal enemy that is trying to kill me and my fellow citizens, that we intend to attack them.

I beg the forgiveness of the innocent Palestinian civilians who are subjected to the brutal rule of their leaders, for not being able to wipe out that scourge which they may not support, even if they do not have the cajones to take care of their own internal problems.

I am sorry that our hostpitals are so much better than yours that we are the people you turn to for medical aid when your people are sick or injured.

I am sorry that when Yasser Arafat stole untold billions of dollars in foreign aid, rather than using that money to build you a state of your own, we did not give you untold billions more out of our own pockets, to help you destroy our state and loot our entire nation’s resources.

I repent for our army’s accidents against the innocent Palestinians who have nothing to do with terror or the insanity of this stupid war. You are simply not our targets, and we mourn your loss of life as well as the injuries you sustain. It is our desire to establish a real peace between our two people, and for that I am also sorry, because I know it is contradictory to the ambitions of those who rule the roost over your heads.

I ask for your forgiveness for having a defensive capability known as the Iron Dome, which is quite robust in shooting down the missiles that your beloved jihadists shoot at us, without any warning, in their hopes to kill more of my peace-loving brothers and sisters.

I am sorry that we don’t just lose this war already, so that you can take over the entire nation, kill millions of Jews, drench yourself in our blood the way that you did during the infamous lynching of two of our sons at your hands in the Second Intifada, and use this land as a launching pad for more Islamist holy wars against the rest of the non-jihadi world.

I beseech your mercy for our cruelty in not fixing the power lines that your jihadis knocked down. How dare we not send our men and women to restore electricity to the people who are hell-bent on wiping us out and driving us into the sea?

I apologize to the pro-Palestinian people around the world who have never read a history book, and certainly never passed a fully-accredited History test. Your ignorance is clearly the fault of the Israeli people, because obviously we control all of the media, especially throughout the Muslim world, where your propaganda and vitriolic hate speech and brainwashing of your children to hate Jews and Israel are clearly offset by things like the facts and history books which are all clearly written exclusively by the hand of us, the evil Jews who lurk in the shadows and conspire to keep control of the world, just as it was revealed in the Elders of Zion.

I am sorry that when anti-Semites around the world act violently against Jewish communities, more of us don’t just embrace you for your attacks, and convert to your insane religion of hate and your culture of death, and that the rest of us don’t just up and kill ourselves the way you wish we would, so that you could be rid of the “Jewish problem” once and for all.

I apologize that we do not send our mothers and children to rooftops to stand in solidarity, waiting to die at your hands, while you do exactly that when we tell you to get out of the way of our incoming ordinance.

I am sorry that we take cover when you lob your rockets on our towns and cities, rather than run headlong into your line of fire.

I am terribly sorry that we do not just put up our hands and surrender to the people who have sworn to “finish Hitler’s job” and liberate “Palestine” (which was never a sovereign nation, and therefore must be ‘liberated’ in your logic, of course) from the Jordan River to the Mediterranean Sea.

I am sincerely remorseful that your rockets are not yet atomic weapons, so that you could just kill us all at the push of a button, even if it means suiciding yourselves as well.

I am terribly sorry that your own Palestinian Representative to the UNHCR admitted that every rocket fired at Israel is a crime against humanity, and that our military does not do so because we strictly follow the rules of war, and prosecute those among our own ranks who violate them.

I am awfully repentant that in 7 days of non-stop volleys of rockets against our population centers, you have yet to score a symbolic victory by destroying any of our major infrastructure, or slaughtering large numbers of our civilians.

I am really sorry that those of us who have died or been injured as a result of your terrorist attacks are mentioned anywhere in news reports, because of course their crime of being alive is far greater than your crime of killing them.

I am sorry that your fellow Palestinians in Hebron and Jerusalem are also suffering injury and loss of property caused by your own rockets, because of course, if we Jews would simply lay down and wait for you to savagely kill us and dance on our graves, you would have no reason to attack them … even though you hate them almost as much as you hate us, being that you are Islamists and they are secular socialists. Clearly you would all live as brothers and sisters, in peace and co-existence, with the very people whom you have also slaughtered in Gaza when you took over brutally, ousting the Palestinian Authority.

I am so sorry that your much vaunted Unity Government between Hamas and the Palestinian Authority has been quite literally hoisted by its own petard, in your futile attempt to distract the attention of the world about your internal financial problems and fuedal fiefdoms which vie for control of that sandy strip of coastal real estate you call home.

I am sorry that in 2005, when Israel uprooted itself from Gaza, we left tens of millions of dollars of assets for you to use to build a peaceful and democratic nation. Obviously this unilateral, anti-Zionist act of kindness and extended hand of loving peacefulness was a great causus belli for you to destroy it all and turn the Gaza Strip into an even more pathetic cesspool of inhuman tragedy and blame it on we, the malignant Jews, who simply refuse to die, despite eons of attempts by dozens, nay, hundreds of hateful nations, led by ignorance and anti-Semitism.

I am sorry that what you recently started calling the Haram al-Sharif has been for thousands of years known as the Har HaBayit, or Temple Mount, because obviously when you try your hand at writing revisionist history, our undeniable link to this land and to that one holy place we Jews have on Earth, we are obviously obstacles to your people’s ambitions of obliterating any sign of our presence there, despite thousands of years’ worth of archaelogical, cultural and written evidence to the contrary.

I’m sorry that Israel accepted the cease-fire which you, Hamas, said you wanted, and then rejected before even reading the one Egypt offered both sides on the 6th and 7th day of the war. For doing so, Israel has been forced to defend itself even after unilaterally accepting the cease-fire, and once again you are making her look better in the eyes of the world, despite your best offert to come off as a peaceful people.

But most of all, I am sorry for the Jewish people’s history and roots here in Israel. Clearly, if we had never been born, then you would have no reason to be upset, except maybe for the fact that your forefather, Ishmael, who was our forefather’s cousin, would also not have been born, and Christianity and Islam would never have existed, either. So then where would you be? Who would you have to hate to feel fulfilled in that scenario? I am sorry that this would be the case, too. I suppose I should also apologize to you for that, because then you would have to “invent the Jews” simply in order to try to wipe us out.

Will you please accept my apology and forgive me for all of these terrible things we do, namely, existing?

Sincerely,

me

p.s.: The one thing I am not sorry for, is the sense of humor and sarcasm that we Jews have inculcated in enlightened civilzations. Maybe you should put down the spicy food, turn off your horrible wailing music, and also try a dose of humor. Who knows? You might even get a laugh out of it.

Full disclosure: When not knocking down politics and the insanity of war, Yasha Harari has composed music and written songs of war, peace and love, performed for millions of people, built and torn down homes in Jerusalem and invested in music, the internet, media and political organizations in the U.S., Europe and Israel.

 

About the Author
Yasha Harari is an editorial cartoonist and entrepreneur with decades of experience spanning a broad variety of business expertise, including political lobbying, startups, internet technologies, publishing, marketing and the arts. Yasha made aliyah from the U.S. in 1998. His comics and caricatures have been featured in books, websites, accessories, and worn by runway models in fashion shows from Milan to St. Petersburg.
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