Sermons of Rebuke: במדבר

‘Bamidbar’ excerpts

Shabbat Shalom

And the Jews are counted. Number over 600,000, the ones who are to serve in the legions. This shule can’t even get 5 to sponsor a kiddush…It is pathetic.

You ask why the rabbi doesn’t donate. That has to do with the fact that your rabbi is a Levi, and thus exempt from doing any labor…And you dare to ask the rabbi to go out and try get new members…You dare to…

However, when it comes to Holy Service, that is for the Leviim. Putting up and taking down the Mishkan. That is for the Leviim alone. That is their service.
(1:51) ‘And the foreigh (non-Levi) that comes near’ to the putting up or taking down of the Mishkan ‘shall die.’
The Gabbai of this shule is not a Levite…
We all have services that we should be doing. There are times and places for all of us. The Gabbai…Out of a congregation of 250 families, you cannot tell me that nobody can be of service…

Now we still have the burnt door at the entrance to the synagogue which we have to fix. After investigation, it is clear that it was not an act of anti-semitism. It was the aftermath of Lag BOmer. The Max children thought it would be a good idea to burn the synagogue door, as it is made out of wood…They are not willing to volunteer to…We have questioned the Max family as self-hating Jews…

***These are excerpts from the sermon. For the sermon in its entirety, come see David Kilimnick perform at the Off The Wall Comedy Basement, in downtown Jerusalem.
David also tours as a Maggid with very few stories, if you invite him.
Shabbat Shalom

About the Author
David Kilimnick: Jerusalem's Comedian performs at his Off The Wall Comedy Basement- Jerusalem's first comedy club, every Thursday in English and every Wednesday in Hebrew, in downtown Jerusalem. David may also be contacted to perform for tour groups in Israel & Synagogue fundraisers around the world, and for your private parties. Contact: david@israelcomedy.com 972(50)875-5688 David Kilimnick, dubbed Israel's father of Anglo comedy by the Jerusalem Post, is leading the new pack of English-speaking stand-up comics in Israel . At his Off the Wall Comedy Basement club in Jerusalem (the first of its kind), Kilimnick has been offering up penetrating observations of life in his turbulent adopted country. Tourists and native Israelis alike have been flocking to his cozy, intimate club and raving about his unique ability to transform the daily chaos and aggravation of Israeli life into an evening full of laughter. Kilimnick's material covers the rocky transition from his "New York Cocoon" to his new life as an "Oleh Chadash" or Israeli newcomer. Still single, Kilimnick touches on his religious upbringing, his rabbinic insights, the injustices of Jewish grammar school and Jewish summer camp, and the looks he gets from his Jewish mother because he isn't married yet. Meanwhile, Kilimnick's universal humor takes you on a tour of funny through the Holy Land. Incorporating routines from his shows 'The Aliyah Monologues Classic 1 & 2','Find Me A Wife,' 'Frum From Birth: Religious Manifesto', his music show 'Avtala Band' & more, David Kilimnick justifies his Aliyah (move to Israel), while taking you through the reality of life as a single immigrant, Israel experiences, holidays & family left behind. You are sure to walk away entertained, enlightened, or with David. David has recently appeared on "Bip" Israel's comedy network, צחוק מעבודב and has been hailed by the tough Israeli media as a rising star who possesses Seinfeldian charm when he takes to the stage.
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