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David Kilimnick

Sermons of Rebuke: Bahar Excerpts

בהר

Shabbat Shalom,

(25:14) Do not תונו. Whatever that means.
You cannot take advantage of people.
(25:15) You must sell according to the years that are left in the Yovel cycle. That is when the land goes back to its original owner and you are left with nothing.

We all have a piece of knowledge when we sell something. Even so, we may not use that to our advantage, to take advantage of somebody else.
The point is that it is forbidden to be a good businessman…We are taking down every plaque from the shule walls. As each of these people made money by selling at a profit, they are sinners…

Kind of like the guy who sold me a dress at the market in South Africa and told me it was for men. He said it was a traditional South African dress…He told me his grandmother sewed it. I was taken by his story, as he did not look Chinese. I only hope his grandmother in China is healthy…
It turns out that the dress was for women. South African men wear jeans.

(25:17) ‘And you shall fear H.’’
There is stuff that only we know. In business, only the salesman knows the truth…However H’ also knows that you are a liar.

However, there is another side to sales. As 25:14 continues, ‘Or Purchase.’
The buyer must also not be an idiot.. Certain people are meant to be taken advantage of. Example: Any American on vacation…
The new paint job on the shule was way overpriced. Thank you to our board who did not do research

(25:18) Only through this, may we live in Israel לבטח.
It is through honesty in business and allowing the land to rest in its proper times that allows us to stay in the land of Israel. It is only through making smart purchases, that allows us to stay in Israel forever…If we keep getting ripped off, this shule is going to be broke…Stupid board decisions…
Amen. Exactly!!!!!

***These are excerpts from the sermon. For the sermon in its entirety, come see David Kilimnick perform at the Off The Wall Comedy Basement, in downtown Jerusalem.
David also tours as a Maggid with very few stories, if you invite him.
Shabbat Shalom vPesach sameach

About the Author
David Kilimnick: Jerusalem's Comedian performs at his Off The Wall Comedy Basement- Jerusalem's first comedy club, every Thursday in English and every Wednesday in Hebrew, in downtown Jerusalem. David may also be contacted to perform for tour groups in Israel & Synagogue fundraisers around the world, and for your private parties. Contact: david@israelcomedy.com 972(50)875-5688 David Kilimnick, dubbed Israel's father of Anglo comedy by the Jerusalem Post, is leading the new pack of English-speaking stand-up comics in Israel . At his Off the Wall Comedy Basement club in Jerusalem (the first of its kind), Kilimnick has been offering up penetrating observations of life in his turbulent adopted country. Tourists and native Israelis alike have been flocking to his cozy, intimate club and raving about his unique ability to transform the daily chaos and aggravation of Israeli life into an evening full of laughter. Kilimnick's material covers the rocky transition from his "New York Cocoon" to his new life as an "Oleh Chadash" or Israeli newcomer. Still single, Kilimnick touches on his religious upbringing, his rabbinic insights, the injustices of Jewish grammar school and Jewish summer camp, and the looks he gets from his Jewish mother because he isn't married yet. Meanwhile, Kilimnick's universal humor takes you on a tour of funny through the Holy Land. Incorporating routines from his shows 'The Aliyah Monologues Classic 1 & 2','Find Me A Wife,' 'Frum From Birth: Religious Manifesto', his music show 'Avtala Band' & more, David Kilimnick justifies his Aliyah (move to Israel), while taking you through the reality of life as a single immigrant, Israel experiences, holidays & family left behind. You are sure to walk away entertained, enlightened, or with David. David has recently appeared on "Bip" Israel's comedy network, צחוק מעבודב and has been hailed by the tough Israeli media as a rising star who possesses Seinfeldian charm when he takes to the stage.
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