Melanie Landau

The Gift of Eros

“One seems to oneself transfigured, stronger, richer, more complete; one is more complete…”  Nietzsche

“I am more myself than ever before!” Carson

We are sitting on a diamond mine. Every human is a rich network of energies and emotions, with a great capacity to experience pain and pleasure. The feeling capacity, our precious sensitivity, in many cases has been shamed, buried, repressed, silenced by others and then by ourselves. Our sensitivity is one of our greatest gifts and it is the royal pathway to our power. It is also our power.

At our deepest core as humans we long for connection. We long for oneness. We have much work to do with the inner marriage between our feminine and our masculine. It will help us navigate relationships and will save us from projecting on to other people parts of ourselves that we are yet to own.

I have come to know that I am a being who is happiest in devotion. I want to be able to throw myself at something, at someone, to be a vessel, to bring my presence. It is so good to feel connected but sometimes when we feel connected to someone, it evokes our most deepest longings and we may not want to let go. And that is the time when we need to feel the longing and direct it to the Divine. It is not really that other  person who we want, it is God, it is the fullness of who we are.

Many spiritual paths leave out embodiment. And sometimes when they touch embodiment, they leave out eros. So there are many people walking around with very open hearts but not much connection to their lifeforce energy in its totality and their sexual energy in particular. It is awesome to have awoken love in our hearts. And — it is eros that is love’s greatest generator and propeller, manifesting and magnifying love’s power in the world.

In the female body, especially in the cervix and in the whole area of the vagina, there are layers and layers of armoring and pain that are waiting for us to pay them attention with our love and with our honoring. The male body too, is full of emotional armoring, and underneath that, pain. We are sovereign beings in relationship to our body. We can work on much of this with ourselves, by ourselves, with guidance, and we can work on it with others. We are the keyholders of this temple. Like any and every sacred temple, there is no admittance without full and loving presence. We see ourselves as the sacred temple that we are- holding the secrets of life and vulnerability and trust- the invisible threads that keep all things together- and then we get that reflected back to us by others. We are the discerning gatekeepers.

Pleasure is not just pleasure.  Pleasure is one the most powerful divine gifts that we have that can literally stop violence. When we can evoke the pleasure in ourselves and reside in pleasure consciousness then it transforms all those with whom we have contact. For example, stimulation of the cervix as part of full body arousal affects nerves and releases hormones of pleasure and relaxation. Before we get pleasure, we need to release the layers of pain. Some of it personal. Some of it from the collective. It’s possible some is also from past lives and other ways we have collected hurts in our own bodies.

In order to feel the pleasure that heals, each person needs to feel trust and be able to surrender to what is arising. We build this through listening deeply to what we want. Through knowing what our boundaries are. Through communicating our boundaries. Through having our boundaries honored and respected. Through being seen. Through having someone fully present with us, through being present with ourselves and being present with the other. Through knowing that nothing is an interruption. We are invited to share what is arising. This is revelation taking place within the confines of our very own human body.

We are loved. We are blessed. Let us have the courage to take this journey of discovering the capacity of who we can be. For ourselves. And this greatest gift of ourselves to ourselves also becomes the deepest thing we could ever offer another, the world. Because it is through this that we can get the strength and power to fight the fights for justice and for truth, in the fullness, the trustworthiness, the reliability and the resilience of LOVE — the greatest force there is.

About the Author
Born and raised in Melbourne, Australia, Rabba Dr Melanie Landau has 20 years of experience in guiding individuals and groups in transformative processes.and cultivating the sacred. She is committed to the creativity and vitality of a living breathing expansive Torah. She is a couples therapist, empowerment coach and group facilitator. She can be reached on: