The staggering Israeli fly-suit invention

The State of Israel is known throughout the world as the Start-Up Nation due to its numerous and seemingly endless series of breathtaking inventions and innovations, but there is one  which is taking the planet by storm and staggers the imagination. When you next visit Israel look up into the sky and you are bound to see something that will have you shaking your head and rubbing your eyes in disbelief, something you would never dream of seeing in your native land. For there above your head there fly Israelis of all ages, shapes and sizes, flying through the air with the greatest of ease and effortlessly, and they all have one thing in common, they are all wearing the latest incredible Israeli invention, the Tas-zut fly-suit, which  gives the people of Israel an advantage over the rest of the world, the ability to fly at any time anywhere and without having to purchase an airline ticket. Just step into your personal fly-suit and take off!

How did this staggering step forward for humanity come about and why in Israel of all places? It all began with the unbearable traffic jams throughout Israel and one man in particular who was caught in a traffic jam in Jerusalem one morning and vowed to put an end to the vexing and intolerable problem once and for all.

Sitting there in the traffic jam for close on three-quarters of an hour enabled him to come out with all kinds of solutions to the intolerable problem. One solution was to raise the price of petrol to gastronomic heights so that only the very wealthy could afford to run their car. However, on second thoughts this solution was anti-democratic and could lead to social riots. But how about fining people for being caught up in traffic jams according to the time they spent there? This too he decided was halachically unfair and might lead to numerous accidents as drivers sought to escape from the jams and ran into one another or over innocent pedestrians. He even  envisaged  a magnetic force seeping over the traffic jam and sticking the cars into one another but that would result in terrible road blockages and so he had to give up that solution.

And suddenly there burst into his fertile mind an inspiring intuition based on the fact that by profession he was a highly regarded master tailor. But then what on earth did his tailoring  skills have to do with solving the traffic jam problems in the Holy Land. He glanced at the huge assortment of angry drivers in the sea of cars around him and he suddenly had a vision of them all rising into the air from their cars and flying forward and abandoning their vehicles. And then he knew exactly what he must do – he must produce the world’s first suits for flying to any destination without the use of the car.

And no sooner did he arrive home he set to work  designing  the world’s first ever fly-suit with unlimited built-in fly-power.  In no time at all he was being besieged by endless phone calls from Israelis of all ages and faiths begging him to measure them for a fly-suit no matter what the cost. The poor man was forced to open a fly-suit factory to be able to cope with the demand and from a humble tailor he overnight became a shekel billionaire.

Visitors to Israel will gaze with awed-astonishment at the fly-suit-filled skies overhead and the car-less roads below.

About the Author
London-born David Herman came on aliyah in 1966 after graduating from Cambridge University. In the 1960s, he founded the Good Times Publishing Company specializing in publishing newspapers in simplified English, French and Arabic for the Israeli school system. David currenty works as a translator, and is also very active in the field of songwriting and performing under the musical name, David Ben Reuven.