Time to say goodbye, for now.

Today, with a sense of mourning and a pressing need to care for myself, I am temporarily withdrawing from the public sphere, where I shared my ideas and ideals. Exposing oneself should broaden dialogues and forge deeper connections, but in practice, it has brought hostility instead of understanding, more threats than support. Words, once released into the vast sea of public opinion, have become too heavy to bear.

It is time to reflect on the path ahead and to carefully navigate the growing shadows, ensuring they do not engulf me. I am not cut out for martyrdom; it was never my intention. I only sought to share, with all sincerity, the flavor of my life, its challenges, and its beauties.

I hope this pause will be merely an interlude, a moment to catch my breath and rekindle the guiding light. My past is rich with lessons, but it is not a shackle. It has taught me much, but now I must learn to overcome it and expand my own space for freedom. The future remains uncertain, making me hesitant to move forward.

When I began writing on October 7th of last year, after witnessing a pogrom, I felt a strong need to support Israel and my people in ways beyond donating blood or volunteering as I had done. I wanted to help build an alternative. Publishing 130 texts on the Times of Israel blog, I thought I was making a positive contribution. However, from the start, I saw that clearly and publicly expressing my ideas began to impact my job opportunities negatively. After more than 100 days of searching for a position that matched my profile, without success, I had to capitulate. Doors closed not because of a lack of qualifications but, I realize now, due to my political expressions. My voice is silenced so that I can seek a means of livelihood in a society that, regrettably, has lost the capacity to tolerate dissent. Martin Buber once reflected on our nation, stating: “Real freedom begins where the freedom of expression is respected.” They have not defeated my convictions, but darkness prevails for now. Until we meet again, I wish everyone peaceful and enlightened paths.