The Zionist’s Guide to the World Cup (ZGWC) strikes again. Two of the most powerful soccer sides in the world which were not endorsed by the ZGWC–Germany and Belgium–crashed out of the World Cup today. The Mannschaft defeated Costa Rica 4-2, but would have needed about five more goals in order to move onto the knockout rounds. The Belgians tied Croatia, nil-nil, but it was not enough. The Red Devils, along with their likeable Golden Generation, are done.
ZGWC dandies Morocco beat Canada, 2-1, to win Group F. Of the Arab countries entered in this year’s World Cup–Morocco, Tunisia, Saudi Araba, and Qatar–the only one to qualify for the knockout rounds is the only one who has signed onto the Abraham Accords. Some may view this as pure coincidence. Moroccans will now look at their country with particular pride, a country that now has a formal peace treaty with Israel.
For its part, Japan, another heavily favored ZGWC selection, won Group E. The Blue Samurai downed the mighty Spanish squad, 2-1, in a match which saw them both progress to the knockout rounds.
Speaking of knockout rounds….
For those of you scoring at home, of the twelve countries which have qualified for the knockout rounds, eight received thumbs up (USA, Netherlands, Australia, Japan, Croatia, Senegal, France, and Morocco) ratings from the AGWC; one received a pareve rating (Poland); and three received negative ratings (Argentina, England, and Spain). (It should be noted, though, that England received its negative rating from the Scottish judge, so take that for what it is worth.) All-in-all, it has been an outstanding performance by teams favorable to Israel and the Jewish people. Conversely, consider some of the countries bounced from the tournament and their relations to Israel and the Jewish people: Iran, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Tunisia, Belgium, and Germany. Just saying.
Tomorrow brings the last day of thrilling, simultaneous final group matches. In Group G, ZGWC favorite Cameroon will look to pull the upset on Brazil. In the other match, pareve Serbia takes on Switzerland. Long simmering tensions involving Serbian/Albanian/Kosovar relations are expected to come to the surface during this match. A splendid time should be had by all.
Finally, in Group H, there will be a battle of endorsed sides–Uruguay versus Ghana. La Celeste will get the nod here over the Black Stars, but either result is fine. Uruguay will need a win in order to advance to the next round, but Ghana should be through with a tie. In the other match, South Korea takes on Portugal. Portugal has already booked its passage to the knockout rounds, but the ZGWC will be cheering loudly for the Koreans to wallop the Portuguese.