Abandoning Complexity for Compromising – Myself

In a numb moment, suppressing fear, not in the mood to reconsider.

Home safe rooms are a luxury we have by pure coincidence, a standard required for residential building since 1991. A ballistic missile can topple the neighborhood, whether we’re in our safe room or the bomb shelter at the elementary school which is a five-minute power walk away.

We should have shoes – not sandals – in the safe room to protect our feet if necessary to escape into debris, shattered glass, and shrapnel. Since Haim mentioned that earlier this week, I keep shoes, socks, and long pants in the safe room, prepared in the middle of the night, for the scenario. Rest assured, as the siren sounded yesterday, our 9-year-old granddaughter explained this safety measure when I told her and her 7-1/2-year-old cousin (playing barefoot in our bedroom) to bring their shoes into the safe room.

Based on Intelligence, or intelligence, evacuation of Soroka Hospital in Beer Sheva began before it was hit by a ballistic missile. Not a front for a weapon arsenal. Tell me I’ve been critical of Israeli attacks on Gazan hospitals – a struggle with “compromising” values and realities. Containing justification for an Israeli attack on a Gazan hospital, I qualify my inability to justify attacking innocent patients, feeling like a gasping swimmer at sea, relieved by an armrest on a sinking lifeboat made reachable by a wave.

Hoping for a tidal wave. Hoping for the sea change.

Clinging, flinging, wanting war to end, understanding my insistence on alternatives not an argument when confronted by Iranian nuclear developments and disinterest in an agreement that would interfere with its capabilities and commitment to the destruction of Israel.

Don’t call or text your relatives in Iran, Israelis are told. Iranian Jews do not need their loved ones’ concerns to further compromise their situation. Israelis stranded abroad wary of apps phishing for locations, distinguishing them from people offering meals, accommodations, ways of getting home. Verified apps reflect goodwilled people and communities.

Refuse – that sticker on my notebook. Suggesting soldiers refusing to serve would produce effective civilian protest and compel government recalculation of Gaza strategy. Simultaneously, me, saying ultra-Orthodox must be drafted. Telling one population to refuse and saying another should enlist? Sharing socioeconomic responsibility and burden is the message.

Friday evening news item: 16 women pilots and air borne navigators in the Air Force, flying over Teheran. Commentators recall politicians and rabbis who interfered with this progress for women in the IDF. Agreeing with the anchorwoman who comments that this should be the norm, not a feature item. Then I look at the imbalance of men over women on the panel in the improvised studio on a Tel Aviv hotel rooftop and in the newsroom. Confused myself – do I want to be proud of women climbing the military hierarchy or do I want people to refuse draft orders? I want to know we are prepared to defend ourselves. I want to be sure that a perceived offensive attack is for our defense. I prefer no more war. But there I am at sea.

Then I wonder about burdens disempowered populations bear and expectations of power groups that the former demonstrate their loyalty to the hegemony? In Arab cities and towns, public bomb shelters are scarce, homes lack safe rooms. Because. Government priorities.

One thing I know, the prevalence of greater fear than we have experienced since October 7, 2023. The terrifying events of that day sank fears deeper, but their normalization over 20 months finds us talking about the war that began towards dawn on Friday, June 13, 2025, as if we were not at war before.

Since June 13, war in Gaza goes on. Yet Israeli attention is directed to Iranian missile launchpads and nuclear scientists eliminated by Israeli attacks. Families of 53 Israelis still hostage in Gaza discover their frantic concern soaring, lest the government agenda deprioritize them. Some rationalize a connection, interrelated goals between Iran, ending war in Gaza, releasing hostages. But allusions to a two-week war in Iran on June 13 were redefined by IDF Chief of Staff as something longer. After October 7, “long” was first interpreted as three months. Pop-up frivolity: on Thursday, June 12, why did I buy a dress for that wedding in London in August? I’ll wait to buy shoes.

Distracting calculations. Preoccupations with risk management – which shelter is most accessible, which safest. The Iranian threat means it doesn’t matter. A ballistic missile could turn the whole neighborhood to debris.

Cranky? Our 3-1/2-year-old granddaughter’s afternoon nap ended abruptly with the sirens yesterday. She found every opportunity before, during and after dinner to cry about something. Amidst one temper tantrum somebody asked rhetorically “what’s wrong with her?” I couldn’t resist responding: She’s just letting out what I’m keeping inside.

Harriet Gimpel, June 21, 2025