An Apology from a Stranger

Photo by Stuart Miles https://freerangestock.com

Last month I published an article, promoting what I truly believe is the only Solution for Peace in Gaza. Because I am an Orthodox Jew calling promoting an innovative concept on the verge of chutzpah, for Christians to be in charge of rebuilding and rehabilitating Gaza, I have received a wide range of responses from ridiculous to thoughtful, both in support and opposed, from Jews and Christians equally.

The range of Christian responses has been from widely embracing and enthusiastic to doubtful and even some saying there is no solution, and Israel should turn Gaza into a parking lot. The range of comments from other Jews has been similar, but more nuanced opposition.  For instance, one friend opposes the idea because she’s concerned that Christians will be hurt or, God forbid, killed by terrorists in Gaza and that will make Christian support decrease.

Several people have pushed back that brining Christians to rebuild Gaza is a ceding of Jews’ responsibility as the Light unto the Nations to spread Torah.

One response to the article from a stranger was particularly thoughtful, but became unpleasant.

“Y” wrote to me: “I’ll try and keep this short as I feel either I’ll pique your interest, or I’ll go completely ignored. Your suggestion of using Christians as a peace broker is a cop out, are we not the chosen nation chosen to be the moral and ethical teachers of the world? This is antithetical to everything our Torah stands for. Let’s face it either we man up to our role לאור גוים להיות ישועתי עד קצה הארץ or admit we failed, and we are undeserving of Hashem’s kindness and this land.”

“Instead of sending Christians lets send a few Jewish emissaries to open kiruv centers based on the Chabad model, not to teach Jews but to outreach to the Gazans, to teach them of love and the 7 mitzvot. To show them how based on both our prophecies and their holy texts our nations need to unite in order to bring about world Peace! The emissaries need not be Chabad chassidim, I merely use this model as it is one familiar to most.”

“You can choose to ignore it, or help bring about a true revolution.”

This was on Wednesday. I intended to respond, but was very busy and then offline for Shabbat.

On Sunday, “Y” wrote again. “I was right. You wouldn’t respond. You’d rather let the Christians steal the thunder as opposed to fulfilling our spiritual injunction. If we want to have our land we need to merit it. May Hashem bless you with Clarity to see that we cannot keep abandoning the Arab residents of the holy Land, we need to connect with them directly.”

So much for telling me I could ignore his suggestion.

“Y” hit a nerve, and I hit back. “With all due respect, I did receive your email, and it was long and thoughtful, and I had every intention of responding but last week was a particularly busy week. In case you’re not aware, some of us are dealing with a war”.

“I appreciate your perspective, but honestly, I find your email so distasteful almost accusatory that I don’t feel like responding to the substance. I’m very happy for you to open a Chabad in Gaza city, a Young Israel, or a Jewish community center. But I don’t appreciate the underhanded remarks.”

“Y” was contrite, and apologetic. “I apologize for the harshness, but I’ve come to realize that sometimes with sensitive subjects as this I need to push much, I attended a Catholic University and had to call out antisemitism on a few occasions. I knew that there was a chance it was unresponded due to being busy but it’s a chance I was willing to take. It’s a shame that I was too pushy and pushed off the opportunity to get a real response. And yes, I should’ve sent a gentle reminder. Now I must pay the price.”

That was a few weeks ago. This past week, I got another email from “Y.” Curious, I opened it.

“I want to write one more email, both and an apology and a thank you. As the year comes to an end we seek to look internally and reflect on our actions over the year, and ours made quite the impact on me. I wrote you, and then in haste and lack of patience I wrote a second email that was uncalled for, rude, and somewhat disrespectful. Now yes, I’ve apologized and I’m not trying to beat a dead horse. So instead, I want to say more importantly, ‘Thank you.’”

“Your response to my impatience has been a catalyst for a deep dive into how I treat others and how I react to things like this. I’ve looked internally much as a result and have what I’ve worked on and what I will still work on. It is your merit that has helped me to get there. So, I want to wish you a ktiva vhatima tova, and that you should see much merit in all your endeavors as you will certainly receive much merit and reward for the positive impact you’ve had on me up through this year and certainly will for many years to come as well.”

“Praying for the best of all of our people, may we merit to open our eyes and hearts and minds and treat other with good as Hashem wants us to do with the free will be gave us.”

I don’t know where “Y” lives or anything about him. But he is to be credited for turning something unpleasant, for which he took responsibility sincerely, and made it into a lesson for us all. Especially on the eve of Rosh Hashana. Especially nearly 12 months into a war that’s brought about great suffering, but also great unity among the Jewish people. As some of that unity has frayed in recent months, it’s a message that we all need to hear and embrace.

I responded, “Thank you so much for writing. To be honest, I had forgotten all about it but actually your email today is refreshing reminder of the season and the importance of our individual and collective teshuva. Shana Tova.”

Maybe once the Solution for Peace in Gaza is achieved, I’ll drive down to Gaza on a Thursday night and we’ll have cholent together.