search
Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews -- For those who like their news and truths frank and sharp

April Fools’ Day hoaxes, fake news, deception or true?

The periods just before Purim and April First are hard ones on me. Which are the articles trying to fool the readers and which the serious ones? I often can’t tell the difference. Here’s the harvest of the last 24 hours. Can you tell which are pulling a fast one on us and which are not? NB: They are all from respectable news providers.

However, reality is often stranger than fiction. My question is not: Which one is fake news? Rather, I wonder which one isn’t.

I’m afraid that the 13 news items are all true though they each sound too ridiculous to be taken for factual. Don’t ask me – I wasn’t a witness. I only read the news.

  1. 13 states support Trump travel ban

12 state attorneys general and one governor ask court to cancel block on Trump’s updated travel ban.

Look at the list of states: progressive ones, one after the other. How could this be true?

  1. REPORT: TRUMP CALLS OVER UN SETTLEMENTS RESOLUTION LIKELY INTERCEPTED

This, after we heard all the time that of course Obama had not ordered a tap on Trump’s phone. Now we need to believe that the eavesdropping had happened and was accidental?

  1. In new video from Umm al-Hiran incident, officers heard shouting ‘don’t shoot!’

Commands to hold fire ahead of shooting death of resident heard clearly in new footage from deadly evacuation of Bedouin village

However, nothing is heard clearly in this new clip. The video should not be new. It should only be newly revealed. There is only one shot and then the tape stops. Seeing it, one gets the strong impression that are being misled, but probably not for April fools’ day – rather for everyday’s fools.

  1. Satmar Rebbe blasts anti-draft demonstrations

Leader of anti-Zionist Hassidic sect condemns road-blockings by Yerushalmi Faction against draft of yeshiva students.

“We’ve been fighting against the Zionists for more than 60 years now, but there was never any lawlessness like this. Jerusalem residents are suffering, with roads shut down [by protesters] and other actions.” “Imagine yourselves here in New York shutting down Lee Avenue, Bedford Avenue, or the BQE [Brooklyn-Queens Expressway, Interstate Highway 278].”

How can this be true? Vilifying Israel is OK but blocking traffic is not?

  1. Israeli Design Student Gives the World Washing Machine Cuisine

Iftach Gazit, a student at the Bezalel Academy of Arts and Design, has designed, as part of his as part of Gazit’s Industrial Design course, food bags that can be added to the laundry cycle to cook dinner while waiting for your clothes to get clean.

This surely is a prank. You can’t cook food that needs 200 Celsius for half an hour in 50 Celsius for 2 hours (of 8 hours for that matter). But again, who knows? Maybe the artist does not know biochemistry.

  1. Tree believed to have hidden Jews during Holocaust voted Europe’s best

Over 120,000 Europeans took part in this year’s competition by casting their votes for their favorite tree online.

A tree of the year contest? May the best one win. At least these Westerners show respect for the elderly (trees).

  1. Comedian unwraps Holocaust denial with apparel line

When comedian Nathan Fielder found out that his favorite jacket company paid postmortem tribute to a known anti-Semite and Holocaust revisionist in one of their catalogs over a decade ago, he did what any nice Jewish comedian would do: he opened up a competing jacket company.

I want such a jacket because I want to fight Holocaust denial? Sounds crazy to me, but would it be good taste to make yet another Holocaust joke??

  1. Trump ally Giuliani to defend alleged Iran sanctions violator — report

Zarrab is accused of playing a key figure in helping Iran evade sanctions that had been designed to thwart the country’s nuclear program and efforts to carry out terror attacks against Israelis and others.

Sure, what’s next? The leader of ISIS asks Trump for business advice?

9. ISRAELI DEFENSE SOURCE: ‘RECRUITING ALLIES AS SPIES WOULD CROSS RED LINE’

France had obtained spies on Syria but Israel had turned them into spies for Israel.

What would be unethical about that? The best boss gets the workers, no?

10. New York Times Writes Jews out of Crown Heights

This must be a prank, no? Crown Heights without Jews is like Jerusalem without Jews. They must be kidding. But they are serious?

11. Israeli Technology Pulls Water out of Thin Air During AIPAC Conference

… a machine—developed by the Israeli company Water-Gen—that is capable of extracting and purifying water from the air. The company’s machine can produce between 15 and 20 liters of drinking water per day.

In countries without water this will save everyone, their food, their animals, their fodder. Just plug it in and – oops. Plug into what? This is as stupid as the invention of instant water. When you’re without, you open the bag, poor in water, and … it’s ready for drinking. (Better idea: just spread sheets of plastic over the ground and the dew will irrigate the ground.)

  1. US group sues to allow child to be named Allah

State of Georgia says last name must be mother‘s, father‘s or combination; parents say they can‘t get birth certificate

Sounds crazy but truthful, but one never knows.

The Netherlands have a better principle than a privilege for parents to name their children anything they want. They can’t if it’s fair to assume the child will be pestered because of it.

  1. A SMURF TOO SEXY FOR BNEI BRAK?

Advertising campaign for film chooses to leave off female cartoon character – though nobody requested it.

Who can say if this is true or not? It’s already too bizarre that the Smurfs are shown in Israel, with the villain being the hook-nosed wizard Gargamel with his cat Azraël. According to French sociologist Antoine Buéno, Gargamel is suggestive of a stereotype of a Jew, having a big nose, magic powers, love of gold, and keeping a Mezuzah by the door of his hut (clearly identifiable in several panels of the comic).[1]

About the Author
MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, previously a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He often makes his readers laugh, mad, or assume he's nuts—close to perfect blogging. He's proud that his analytical short comments are removed both from left-wing and right-wing news sites. None of his content is generated by the new bore on the block, AI. * As a frontier thinker, he sees things many don't yet. He's half a prophet. Half. Let's not exaggerate. Or not at all because he doesn't claim G^d talks to him. He gives him good ideas—that's all. MM doesn't believe that people observe and think in a vacuum. He, therefore, wanted a broad bio that readers interested can track a bit what (lack of) backgrounds, experiences, and educations contribute to his visions. * This year, he will prioritize getting his unpublished books published rather than just blog posts. Next year, he hopes to focus on activism against human extinction. To find less-recent posts on a subject XXX among his over 2000 archived ones, go to the right-top corner of a Times of Israel page, click on the search icon and search "zuiden, XXX". One can find a second, wilder blog, to which one may subscribe too, here: https://mmvanzuiden.wordpress.com/ or by clicking on the globe icon next to his picture on top. * Like most of his readers, he believes in being friendly, respectful, and loyal. However, if you think those are his absolute top priorities, you might end up disappointed. His first loyalty is to the truth. He will try to stay within the limits of democratic and Jewish law, but he won't lie to support opinions or people when don't deserve that. (Yet, we all make honest mistakes, which is just fine and does not justify losing support.) He admits that he sometimes exaggerates to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * Sometimes he's misunderstood because his wide and diverse field of vision seldomly fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what some love about him. He has written a lot about Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (including basic statistics), Politics (Israel, the US, and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight reality), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA+, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), the Climate Crisis, Ecology and Veganism, Affairs from the news, or the Torah Portion of the Week, or new insights that suddenly befell him. * Chronologically, his most influential teachers are his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim, Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. This short list doesn't mean to disrespect others who taught him a lot or a little. One of his rabbis calls him Mr. Innovation [Ish haChidushim]. Yet, his originalities seem to root deeply in traditional Judaism, though they may grow in unexpected directions. In fact, he claims he's modernizing nothing. Rather, mainly basing himself on the basic Hebrew Torah text, he tries to rediscover classical Jewish thought almost lost in thousands of years of stifling Gentile domination and Jewish assimilation. (He pleads for a close reading of the Torah instead of going by rough assumptions of what it would probably mean and before fleeing to Commentaries.) This, in all aspects of life, but prominently in the areas of Free Will, Activism, Homosexuality for men, and Redemption. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, and disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed. He aims to bring a fresh perspective rather than harp on the obvious and familiar. When he can, he loves to write encyclopedic overviews. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds should be disputed. In short, his main political positions are among others: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, anti those who abuse democratic liberties, anti the fake ME peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, pro-Science, pro-Free Will, anti-blaming-the-victim, and for down-to-earth, classical optimism, and happiness. Read his blog on how he attempts to bridge any tensions between those ideas or fields. * He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (https://diethylstilbestrol.co.uk/studies/des-and-psychological-health/), born in 1953 to his parents who were Dutch-Jewish Holocaust survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork. He grew up a humble listener. It took him decades to become a speaker too, and decades more to admit to being a genius. But his humility was his to keep. And so was his honesty. Bullies and con artists almost instantaneously envy and hate him. He hopes to bring new things and not just preach to the choir. * He holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam) – is half a doctor. He practices Re-evaluation Co-counseling since 1977, is not an official teacher anymore, and became a friendly, powerful therapist. He became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he was active in hasbara to the Dutch-speaking public. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having an original peek outside of your cultural bubble. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me. * His newest books you may find here: https://www.amazon.com/s?i=stripbooks&rh=p_27%3AMoshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&s=relevancerank&text=Moshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&ref=dp_byline_sr_book_1