Be Well; Believe in You

It is a very awkward process as an adult to learn to believe in yourself.

There seems to be a belief that you should know everything you need to know by the time you are an adult. Believing you are such an important experience that awkwardness must be accepted. When children do not receive nurturing and reflective listening to the develop a negative self-talk as a sign of devotion to their parent. When they are neglected or told they can deal with whatever they are needing help with they develop a negative self-talk out of trust for their caretakers. Positive human growth is dependent on believing in you. Growth also comes from negative beliefs that push us forward however the cost of this is we live forever with the idea that shoving people is the way to get them to grow.

The beginning of believing in you is simple words like, “You can do this, I believe in you.” Another possibility is, good job, and, I am proud of you. simple messages of belief and positive encouragement can begin a life of self-confidence and encouraging others. Self-confidence is born through acceptance and encouragement of yourself. As awkward as this feels it is the first new steps towards being there as the audience of your own growth and enjoying the unique experience of being you!

Sometimes the experience of liking yourself is much more complex because of trauma. This can be managed although it takes some support at first. The support can be a friend or a husband (or a professional therapist) but you can still like you. The life we have to live has a beginning and an ending.

By enjoying the process, you can support many others to enjoy their life and you will have a much sweeter experience of your own life.

About the Author
Chana Rochel Frumin is the founder/director of The Jerusalem Narrative Therapy Institute with over 30 years experience in marital and family counseling in the Jerusalem area.