Benefitting from New Year’s Resolutions
Preparations are underway for the upcoming Rosh Hashanah holiday and the start of what we all hope will be a better year than the previous two, during which a multifront war was fought – and continues to be fought – and that each day will be the last one in which the fate of the hostages remains uncertain and the deaths of young soldiers capture the major headlines.
But even in years without the same turbulence and uncertainty, there is no way to overlook that the Jewish new year is celebrated quite differently than how just about the rest of the world fetes the arrival of the Gregorian new year. Whereas 2026, elsewhere, will be greeted with champagne, parties, parades, and midnight kisses, the Jewish world, in contrast, will welcome 5786 with prayer, introspection, and repentance. Yomim Noraim (Days of Awe) to be sure.
But while Jewish laws and traditions do not provide the opportunity for the type of new year festivities and revelry typically associated with January 1, there is no reason why Jews should not adopt one potentially very useful new year’s custom that the non-Jewish world finds to be particularly beneficial – the identification of specific resolutions for the upcoming year.
These resolutions are, for the most part, unrestricted. They focus on improvement-centric goals in such areas as health, personal behavior, and family relations, or set specific educational or professional targets. And, needless to say, undoing bad habits and tendencies is as important as developing positive ones.
The trick is to ensure that the listed resolutions are both personally advantageous and readily achievable. The last thing anyone needs is to be committed to a resolution that involves, unrealistically, a drastic renovation to their day-to-day living; this promises to be more than a little frustrating and will inevitably result in failure. History teaches that small changes can have a large impact.
What follows are twelve recommended resolutions that will undoubtedly help alleviate the stress and pressure currently affecting all of us, one for each month of the coming year.
Month 1 -Tishrei: Count your blessings…literally
It’s easy to overlook the fact that not all is doom-and-gloom. All too many of us take for granted that we are healthy, enjoy fulfilling and satisfying jobs, live not far from neighbors and friends that are around if help is needed, and, well, have a car that starts. Compile a list of these good tidings, and refer to them from time to time as a reminder that it is indeed worthwhile getting out of bed in the morning.
Month 2 – Cheshvan: Don’t spend every free moment in front of a screen
It seems, sometimes, that all aspects of intelligence are rapidly becoming artificial, and flesh-and-blood creatures are being slowly but steadily assimilated into a digitalized world. Turn the tide, I say. There are bound books still to be read, board games to be played, chats to be held face-to-face with human beings and not with bots or avatars, and fresh air to enjoy. Believe me, your world will not come to an end if the computer, tablet, phone, or television goes unplugged for a period of time each day.
Month 3 – Kislev: Join a club
Israel is, if nothing else, one huge clubhouse subdivided into literally dozens of activities and interests, from archery to zoology. Home-bound hobbies are fine, but being in the company of others with whom you have something in common can be educational as well as enlightening.
Month 4 – Tevet: Write one (or more) letters to the editor
Emotions that remain bottled up are unquestionably dangerous, and venting to your family and friends can be both awkward and uncomfortable. But expressing your concerns on politics, education, or crime – to name just a few topics – to the editor of a print or digital newspaper is not only personally therapeutic, it provides important insight that lawmakers pay attention to, and can potentially sway policy and legislation.
Month 5 – Shevat: Make time to help others
Donating a few hours a week as a guide, aide, clerk, receptionist, bookkeeper or whatever provides a “feel good” aura that lingers long after you’ve turned the light off and left for home. And the sincere appreciation that comes with the tasks you’ve undertaken is, in many ways, more lucrative than a conventional salary.
Month 6 – Adar: Get in shape
And, no, you don’t have to become a member of a health club or gym to ensure that the well-being of your body is not being ignored. Regular walks through your neighborhood and the use of stairs rather than an elevator when your destination is on or below the third floor are just several examples of simple but effective forms of daily exercise.
Month 7 – Nissan: Develop a new skill, or enhance an existing one
Community centers are fixtures in just about every Israeli city, town, village, and settlement, and offer advanced, intermediate, and beginners-level courses and workshops on just about everything. And, let’s be honest, wouldn’t it be nice to be able to do something around the house that’s a bit more challenging than changing a light bulb?
Month 8 – Iyar: Don’t put off to tomorrow what can be done today
The time has come to bring procrastination to an end. I am not suggesting the adoption of reckless decision making, but we all too often put off hard or distasteful tasks for another time or hope that something problematic or troubling will disappear if left ignored. Warts, alas, do not go away – they have to be removed. And the sooner the better.
Month 9 – Sivan: Turn conflicts into something positive
Hardly a day goes by when we’re not faced with one sort of confrontation or another. The neighbor who practices the drums at two in the morning, the colleague who blames errors or mistakes on others, the double-parker who boxes you in for “just a minute” that usually turns into fifteen. Rare is the conflict that cannot be resolved quietly and peacefully, with benefits for both parties. It’s worth giving it a shot, don’t you think?
Month 10 – Tamuz: Make time for yourself
Mini-vacations away from everyone can often be invaluable. Sip a cappuccino in a beachfront cafe, browse the new titles in an avant-garde book store, window shop (or people watch) while strolling along a bustling commercial district, or do whatever you have always wanted to do but never found – or, rather, took – the time. And there is absolutely no reason to feel guilty about enjoying a few “me by myself” hours.
Month 11 – Av: Start a budget
Ever wonder why you’re left with so little at the end of the month? Maybe the time has come to figure it out. Perhaps you’ve been spending too much on take out, or have been ignoring minor appliance problems that can easily turn into major – and expensive – ones. Create a family-centric balance sheet, figuring out how much you can freely spend for each identified expense category. Oh, and the most critical aspect of creating a budget: KEEP TO IT!
Month 12 – Elul: Embrace the blessing of forgiveness
What else would be appropriate for the month of Elul. Grudges and hatred – often based on petty, meaningless incidents – are the emotional equivalence of life-threatening cancers. And forgiveness is the sure-fire cure. Life is way too short to be consumed by anger and resentment. The internal freedom and relief that comes with forgiveness – in both directions, of course – cannot be overstated.
So go ahead and start the new year off on the right foot. We’re all praying, of course, that the anxiety of the last two years will soon come to an end, but defining and following through with several personal resolutions will undoubtedly help you cope better if it doesn’t.
