Rebecca Ramo-Cofino

CNN investigative journalism: Possible instance of mild Islamophobia (may have) occurred SATIRE

In the latest display of clear concern for and solidarity with the earth’s declining ecosystems, an angry mob of Los Angeles community members rallied outside of the Akber Masjid mosque in Los Angeles, CA, blockading worshippers from entering, and declaring, “All Muslims must die!”  

Community members were seen holding signs that said “Bomb Mecca!” and “Through Earth’s Mantle, Crust, and Core, We Don’t Want Amalek no More!

These rallies have increased in number as the Muslim war in the Middle East has raised tensions abroad.  Some groups quickly declared the incident Islamophobic, while other more progressive groups acknowledged that people all over the globe simply want a world free of the pollution caused by suicide bombing.  

Authorities are currently investigating this incident as a possible hate crime. “We don’t want to jump to conclusions before we have all of the facts, especially with so much misinformation going around,” a CNN master journalist relayed.

Incidents of racism have increased throughout the country in recent years.  Muslims report that Islamophobia is on the rise.

“What occurred was an expected clash between protesters and counter protesters.  This declaration of genocide was mostly peaceful.  There are always extremists on both sides.  While investigators check for possible evidence of Islamophobia, it is important to keep in mind how passionate people are about the environment.  The amount of toxic emissions released into the atmosphere when jihadists go “Boom!” is deeply upsetting.  This is not an attack on religion,” one CNN champion of neutrality said.

CNN reporters checked in with members of the gentle militant mob who were seen burning hijabs. “Wanting a world free of Islam is not Islamophobic.  Muslims need to stop complaining that all criticism of Islam is Islamophobic and see the big picture.”  

The group “Muslim Voices for Peace” also made an appearance at the rally. The group’s spokesperson, “Brian,” stated, “I am Muslim and therefore speak for all Muslims in saying that my religion is a terrorist religion.  I’m so embarrassed by my fellow Muslims.  We need to reclaim our religion.  Brian led a Muslim Seder with a pork barbecue in observance of Ramadan this year. He said it was a pluralistic and welcoming celebration that represented “real Muslim values.”  He has a BA in Industrial Psychology and is an amateur photographer.  “Brian” did not wish to reveal his name or white sheet cladded face to CNN due to all of the hatred and narrow mindedness happening in 2024.

About the Author
Rebecca Ramo-Cofino is a satirist, singer, special education teacher, and amateur violinist. She currently is the head of a special education department in Denver Public Schools. Her unique voice is informed by her extensive experience in education, as well as her involvement in many different types of Jewish communities.
Related Topics
Related Posts