Coming Out Zionist

Love the sinner but hate the sin.
I’ve heard this before.
It didn’t work then and I doubt it will work now.
I know this as I live at the intersection of being a Jewish Gay Zionist.
Thinking back 40 years, I remember conservatives claiming that they were not homophobic. They had nothing against homosexuals. They claimed to love homosexuals.
Their problem was homosexual ‘behavior’.
So long as you didn’t engage in homosexual ‘behavior’ – by which they mean sexual acts between two people of the same sex – you would be perfectly acceptable: kind of. You would be viewed with a degree of pity and condescension.

In 2024 I and my partner, who I met in 2002, finally got legally married.
Note to conservatives who are fine with homosexuality but not homo sex:
If you want to prevent two men from having sex, let them get married. It works for us just the same as for most straight couples.

Over the past few years – since October 7, 2023 – I have been hearing many people say that they have no problem with Jews, just with Zionism.

Let me give you some definitions as I understand them.

Jew – the children Israel. We are a people who share common languages (Hebrew Yiddish and/or Ladino), culture, cuisines, traditions, history, values and yes, ethnicity. My “23 and  Me ™ results came back 97% Eastern European Jew. We also share a religion, Judaism.
Some of us are religiously active and observant, some are not.
Some of us keep kosher, some don’t.

PS – I was raised in a totally non-kosher home. I now keep a kosher home. My non-kosher pork-eating Jewish mother now calls me a convert.

Zionism – Webster’s dictionary defines Zionism as

“An international movement originally for the establishment of a Jewish national or religious community in the historical region of Palestine and later for the support of modern Israel.”

Judaism predates Zionism.
Zionism was born long before the establishment of the modern state of Israel in 1948, a time known as the Nakba among the Palestinian people. It predates the IDF, the Likud party, Benjamin Netanyahu, October 7, and its horrible aftermath for the people of Gaza and the people of Israel.

Yet, the word Zionist has become a dirty word.

Zionist has come to be synonymous with genocidal baby killer in some circles.

And that is why today, many conflate the words Jew, Zionist, and Terrorist.

It also forces many Jews to qualify their existence by claiming “I am a Jew, but not a Zionist” which is code for ‘I am not a terrorist, I’m one of the good ones.’
This reminds me of the ‘good’ Jews who considered themselves ‘good Germans’ who in the end, suffered the fate of all Jews.

It also provides cover for truly antisemitic people – those who truly hate Jews – by giving them the love- the-sinner-but-hate-the-sin argument. They claim to have no problems with Jews, only the Jews who embrace Zionism or Zionist ‘behaviors.’

The conflation of terms is particularly problematic in one of the neighborhoods in which I have lived – the LGBTQ+ community. Even before October 7, Jewish lesbians and gays wearing rainbow-colored stars of David were asked to leave Pride marches. They were told the star of David, a centuries-old symbol emblazoned on shields used in a liberation battle – was a triggering symbol of oppression.

And Queers for Palestine – an anti-Zionist group – figures prominently at Pride events.

Newsflash:

Just this week, a prominent support of this group and his friend were gunned down outside a gay bar in Tucson Arizona.

More recently, a very progressive, Jewish politician was publicly hounded out of a Pride festival and told he could ‘no longer be queer’ because he was accused of being a Zionist sympathizer.

Coming full circle, a conservative pundit quipped – finally – a way to make this dude stop liking other dudes – Zionism.

And in recent months, the Democratic party in my hometown New York City – the most Jewish city in the world outside of Israel which I lovingly refer to as the old country– has coalesced around a decisively anti-Zionist platform. Nationwide, opposing any aid to Israel and denouncing AIPAC have become litmus tests for party purity among progressives. Maybe you can argue that’s Anti-Zionist and not antisemitic.

But what about the alarming uptick in blatant antisemitism in New York and throughout the world? Synagogues and other Jewish institutions have been attacked. This includes the desecration of cemeteries where long dead Jews rest.  Must they also be held liable?

So, as an old-fashioned, east coast, intellectual, homosexual, ethnic, religiously observant Jew who believes deeply in a Jewish homeland – I find myself a man without a party. Too Jewish for the left – and too gay for the right.

Those who know me know I have an eccentric trademark look including a turtleneck, Kangol Hat, blazer, and brooch. I have dozens of brooches. But in 2026, I am less hesitant to wear a rainbow-themed brooch than to wear a Jewish-themed Star-of-David brooch in public.

In higher education we value embracing our multiple identities. But I stay up nights worrying that some identities may be more equal than others.