Yesterday I was talking with a friend of mine at work who is unfortunately going through a bit of a hard time. He and his partner are on a relationship “break” and he is really struggling. I totally get the struggle. When an ex and I took a “break,” it was worse for me than the actual break up itself a few months later. Any song that came on the radio made me think of him and what was worse; every song that came on was about love or being sad.
You know that song, “I’ll stand by you” well that came on and the words.. “Oh, why you look so sad, tears are in your eyes, come on and talk to me now.” SLIT MY WRIST DEPRESSION OR WHAT!!?
Anyway, it is always hard when a friend is sad and especially because of a boyfriend/girlfriend. So there I am trying to comfort my friend, giving him advice when I said; “don’t worry babe, it will all work out for the best, you know everything happens for a reason!”
As I said it, I thought to myself, has this sentence become something we ‘just say,’ or is there actual definition behind it? Does everything actually happen for a reason or is this just something we say as a coping mechanism?
When I look back on relationships I have had and guys I have been with and they didn’t work out, at the time I did not know why. I would beat myself up trying to figure out if it was something I did or if I wasn’t good enough, but at the end of it all, even years down the line, you find out what was really going on and you are not fazed by it anymore because, at the time it happened for some reason or another and because of it, something else great happened.
It’s like that saying, “When one door closes, another one opens!” Now this, I totally believe in. Yes, at the time we are devastated about the one who we thought was the most amazing thing since sliced bread, but there were lessons you needed to learn to be ready for the one who is waiting for you. Then you meet someone else and you think to yourself, “Well, if I didn’t end with him/her, I wouldn’t have met this one!”
Don’t get stuck in if, but’s and why. Accept what it is and move on because don’t forget, everything happens for a reason!