For Shavuot: Gotta Love Naomi

Naomi and the child Obed – Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Perhaps because I am no longer young, I find myself with increasing affection for Naomi, mother-in-law to the biblical Book of Ruth’s title character. Ruth seems forever young. Despite the collapse of her home life, Ruth embraces an uncertain future with passion and naïve enthusiasm. In contrast, Naomi’s words and actions reflect the depth of her life experiences.

As a young woman, Naomi (נעֳמִֽי, Na’ami) married Elimelech, who lived in Bethlehem, in the area then known as Judah. The couple had two sons, Mahlon and Chilion. During a famine, the family relocated from Bethlehem to the non-Israelite land of Moab. Over the next 10 years, Elimelech died, Naomi finished raising the boys and Mahlon and Chilion married Moabite women.

Then, the Book of Ruth tell us, “those two—Mahlon and Chilion—also died; so the woman [Naomi] was left without her two sons and without her husband” (Ruth 1:5). Naomi now had no means of support, so she decided to return to Judah.

Initially, the two widowed daughters-in-law, Orpah, Chilion’s wife, and Ruth, Mahlon’s wife, join Naomi on the journey back to Judah. But Naomi repeatedly urges them to return to their birth families. Orpah,  with many tears and a weepy goodbye, turns back. Ruth, however, remains determined to stay with Naomi and the two women resume their journey.

Back in Bethlehem, Ruth meets and charms Boaz, a land-owning relative of Naomi’s. They marry, providing financial security for Ruth and Naomi. The couple produce a son, Obed, who, in turn, becomes grandfather to the future King David.

It’s a lovely story, perhaps intended to demonstrate that outsiders (such as Moabite Ruth) can become full members of the Israelite community. Not only does intermarriage prove acceptable, but such a union even starts the genetic line of Israel’s kings!

But what about Naomi impresses me in this story?

When we first meet Naomi, she is distraught because her life has been devastated. But she is also realistic. She understands that she cannot provide for herself, let alone for Orpah and Ruth. Referencing a custom known as Levirate marriage in which another son is obligated to marry his brother’s widow, Naomi dramatically rejects the model:

“Turn back, my daughters! Why should you go with me? Have I any more sons in my body who might be husbands for you? Turn back, my daughters, for I am too old to be married. Even if I thought there was hope for me, even if I were married tonight and I also bore sons, should you wait for them to grow up? Should you on their account debar yourselves from marriage?” (Ruth 1:11-13).

Naomi is open about her predicament and feelings. As the text recounts: “When they arrived in Bethlehem, the whole city buzzed with excitement over them. The women said, ‘Can this be Naomi?’ ‘Do not call me Naomi,’ she replied. ‘Call me Mara, [[מָרָ֔א for Shaddai has made my lot very bitter’” (Ruth 1:19-20).

Because Naomi translates from the Hebrew as “my delight” or as “my melodious sound,” Naomi now claims the name Mara, which means bitter in Hebrew, capturing her bitter feelings about being abandoned by God” (Ruth 1:19-20).

(In Hebrew and in English, “bitter” conveys both human emotion and a nasty taste. Thus, the spring where the Israelites found unpalatable water during their Sinai desert wanderings was also called Mara.)

Although disconsolate, Naomi understands that she and Ruth need to eat. Accordingly, Naomi encouraged Ruth when Ruth told her she wanted to glean fallen barley sheaves left for those in need as prescribed in Leviticus and Deuteronomy. When Naomi learns that Ruth has joined the young women in fields owned by Boaz (a near kinsman) and that Boaz has spoken kindly to Ruth, she snaps into action.

Realizing that Boaz might, as a kinsman, have some obligation for their support, Naomi advises Ruth to spend the barley and wheat harvest season with the young women gleaning in Boaz’s fields.

Once the harvests are completed and the grains are ready for threshing, Naomi devises a plan for Ruth to be noticed by Boaz while remaining demure and subservient. Naomi instructs Ruth to bathe, anoint herself, dress up, go down to the threshing floor and wait until after he’s dined before arranging to be noticed.

Naomi’s plan works: Boaz falls for Ruth and they wed. Ruth becomes pregnant and bears a son. And the text reports that “Naomi took the child and held it to her bosom. She became its foster mother” (Ruth 4:16).

Yes, passionate, sweet, hard-working Ruth is the hero of the story. But we’d be remiss to discount Naomi’s role. A generation older, Naomi has learned that whatever the promise of youth, life is not easy. Despite the deaths of her husband and sons and despite her own understandable despair, she moves forward.

Naomi has experienced much and learned much. She is open about how she sees the world and sincere in her concern for her daughters-in-law. In Naomi, I see a full range of human emotion, from sadness and depression, through pragmatism and on to joy. I’ll bet Naomi was a terrific grandmother.

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Michele is a member of the Hadassah Writers’ Circle, a dynamic and diverse writing group for leaders and members to express their thoughts and feelings about all the things Hadassah does to make the world a better place. It’s where they celebrate their personal Hadassah journeys and share their Jewish values, family traditions and interpretations of Jewish texts.