Honoring Shulamit: Reclaiming Female Sexuality and Power

My mother’s name was Shulamit. I never thought much about it growing up, since I called her Imma—Mom in Hebrew. The name itself didn’t come up often, though it was unique and quite beautiful to my American friends. She’s still the only Shulamit I’ve ever known. One day, I decided to look up the name’s origin and discovered that Shulamit is a central figure in the Song of Songs, a woman whose sensuality and erotic nature are celebrated in the Torah, or Hebrew Bible.

This revelation startled me. My mom died when I was nine, and sex was never a topic of discussion in our household. I didn’t think of her—or any mother—as a sexual being. It wasn’t that sexuality was shamed or forbidden in our family; it just seemed invisible, something unspoken. But the more I read about Shulamit in the Bible, the more intrigued I became.

The Jewish Women’s Archive describes Shulamit as one of the most positive depictions of young womanhood in the Hebrew Bible. They write:

“The Shulammite (from Hebrew shulammit, ‘woman of Jerusalem’) is the central figure in the Song of Solomon (also called Song of Songs or Canticles) and one of the most positive representations of young womanhood in the Hebrew Bible. As the embodiment of erotic pleasure—innocent and savored for its own sake—she is contrasted with the wily seductress of Proverbs 7, whose sexuality is insidious and destructive, and with figures like Tamar and Ruth, whose sexual boldness serves the purpose of perpetuating the family line. In Shulamit, we find one of the most unqualified celebrations of female eroticism in all of Western literature.”

Photo of the book, Shulamit, by Roberta Kells Dorr. Coincidentally (or not), this image feels like my mom’s essence.

This portrayal fascinates me, especially in contrast to modern society. Today, female sexuality is often cast as something dangerous, even shameful. We live in a culture that condemns women who embrace their sexual power, women who challenge the narrative that they must be protected from their own bodies and desires.

Sexuality is too often portrayed as “insidious and destructive,” obscuring its natural innocence and beauty. One of my mentors, Nicole Daedone, dared to push back against this narrative. She teaches that sexuality can be a force of healing and empowerment. For that, she is now facing federal indictment. She is being prosecuted, in part, for challenging the idea that women are powerless victims in matters of sex—a message that seems controversial in the post-#MeToo era, where women’s autonomy is sometimes eroded under the guise of protection.

Sexual violence and abuse are never acceptable. No one should feel coerced or forced into any sexual encounter. But if we strip women of all responsibility and choice regarding their own sexuality, if we treat them as perpetual victims, how can they ever be free? True freedom means the ability to own our power and make our own choices.

In Nicole’s case, the government initially investigated her for sex trafficking for teaching a practice called Orgasmic Meditation (OM), which focuses on women’s sexual wellness. After five years of searching for the evidence, they shifted to charging her with a novel labor conspiracy charge. Authorities have painted her as a societal threat for promoting a practice that has been scientifically shown to foster healing, connection, and numerous health benefits.

At its core, this case isn’t about whether women should engage in a particular practice. It’s about freedom. Do women have the right to express their sexuality, to live in alignment with their desires, to own their bodies without government interference? This case underscores a broader societal fear of female sexuality—a fear that leads to over-regulation, judgment, and suppression.

If even the Bible, through the story of Shulamit, can celebrate eroticism, why is our modern society so terrified of it? Instead of honoring women’s power, the instinct is often to tear them down. Rather than allowing women to make their own choices, institutions try to dictate what they can and cannot do with their bodies.

The Song of Songs portrays Shulamit as a woman who boldly declares her feelings and desires. She is celebrated, not silenced. What would it look like to live in a society where women’s desires were met with acceptance rather than fear? Nicole Daedone advocated for that vision of the world—and now she faces the possibility of 20 years in prison for it.

Maybe it’s time we stop fearing women’s power and start honoring it. Perhaps we need to reclaim the legacy of Shulamit—a legacy that celebrates the beauty of female sexuality, not as something to be hidden or feared, but as a vital, life-affirming force. Because the real danger isn’t sexuality itself. It’s a society that tries to strip us of the freedom to embrace it.