Hope held hostage: We imagined Omri’s return – then it collapsed

“I can’t breathe.” That was my sister Lishay’s first message to us on Tuesday morning, March 18, when fighting between Israel and Hamas resumed. She had allowed herself to hope. She saw Omri (Miran) – her husband, taken hostage – stepping through the door. She imagined their daughter, Alma, running into his arms, their family whole again. She pictured him at Alma’s birthday at the end of this month, laughing, free. She saw him celebrating his own birthday on April 11 – not in captivity, but surrounded by love.

Then, in an instant, that hope vanished. The ceasefire collapsed. It was a gut punch – but not a surprise. Hamas never negotiated in good faith. It offered impossible terms. But Israel’s failure to manage the talks made everything worse.

For those of us with loved ones held hostage, every day is a battle between despair and hope. The past few weeks, as hostages were returned, gave us a fragile lifeline. But now, we’ve been plunged back into darkness.

From breathlessness, we moved back into action – in Israel and in the US, in Jerusalem and Washington – pleading with elected officials and envoys, reminding them of their promise: to do everything possible to bring Omri and the remaining 58 hostages home.

Phase 2 negotiations were always going to be difficult. There was no illusion about that. The gaps are too wide, and the interests are too misaligned. Hamas was never a good-faith partner. It used the ceasefire as a tactical pause to consolidate power, execute dissidents, and parade hostages through Gaza – turning human suffering into grotesque propaganda. It exposed its brutality with a clarity that hardened Israel’s stance and reinforced the Trump administration’s position: peace through strength.

Bargaining chips

No agreement would have changed Hamas’s fundamental view of people as bargaining chips. Hostages as leverage. Civilian casualties – on both sides – as tools to maintain its rule. That’s why dismantling Hamas is not just an Israeli objective – it is a moral imperative and a geopolitical necessity.

But Israel also bears responsibility for the breakdown of talks. Phase 2 was partially botched. Political and personal agendas began to override military and humanitarian priorities. The mission – free the hostages, degrade Hamas’ war capabilities, and prevent its return to power in Gaza – should have remained clear. Instead, it became entangled with maneuvering and self-interest.

That’s why many Israelis are pushing back: protesting, pressuring, demanding answers. When trust between citizens and the state is already frayed, every decision driven by political survival over national interest deepens the wound.

The past week made that even clearer. Ben Gvir’s party rejoined the government as fighting resumed. Shin Bet chief Ronen Bar was fired. A hearing was set for Attorney General Gali Baharav-Miara. And the judicial reform legislation returned – again. Were negotiations genuinely exhausted? Or were political calculations in play? The government owes us more than silence.

It also must answer this: Did it really believe it could demand a ceasefire extension without committing to Phase 2? Did it expect Hamas to accept open-ended delays? And how could any deal be pursued while publicly declaring that fighting would resume immediately afterward? The refusal to lay out a serious post-war plan for Gaza has weakened Israel’s credibility – and leverage.

Now, senior officials argue that renewed military pressure will bring Hamas back to the table. But even if that’s true – at what cost?

Some believe the deaths of hostages, soldiers, and civilians are a price worth paying. I do not. Not without exhausting every other option. Military force is necessary. So is diplomatic and strategic pressure. But neither should come at the expense of the hostages.

Israel must dismantle Hamas, but it must do so without losing itself. If hostages become secondary, we undermine the very social contract that binds us together as a nation.

Beyond the battlefield, there is another war, and Hamas is already winning it: the war of perception. Every time its propaganda is echoed, its crimes excused, or its “grievances” elevated while hostages are erased, it gains ground. Hamas doesn’t need battlefield victories when it can win with narrative control.

This is why framing matters. When hostages are reduced to numbers, when Hamas’s atrocities are folded into some false “cycle of violence,” when Israel is scrutinized while Hamas is shielded from accountability, that’s not just distortion – it’s complicity. Hamas thrives not only on terror, but on the world’s willingness to justify it.

Israel is not above criticism. But in the world’s eyes, Hamas is above accountability.

Anyone critiquing Israel’s conduct must remember: this war could have ended with Hamas’s leaders in exile, its weapons dismantled, Gaza reconstituted and de-radicalized, and the hostages freed. That was possible on October 8, 2023. It’s still possible now. The only thing that has changed is the human cost for Israelis and Palestinians alike.

I don’t know if renewed fighting – and the spark of outrage across Gaza over the past few days by tens of thousands of demonstrators – will force Hamas to recognize that truth. But perhaps, with US pressure and leadership from the Trump administration, it will force its backers to.

Still, the question remains: At what cost?