How to prepare Jewish kids for antisemitism

The surge in antisemitic incidents in educational settings has created unimaginable stress and trauma for students, educators, administrators, parents and grandparents alike. Taunts, threats, and acts of violence catch us off-guard and unprepared. Inter-generational trauma is being triggered all over again for Jews around the globe.

While we enjoy summer vacation, it is incumbent upon all Jewish parents and educators to address the possibility of encountering antisemitism, including at school. Undoubtedly, this is a difficult conversation to conduct – certainly unexpected in our day – but preparing our children can empower us, keep them safe, and actually create a sense of pride.

Where do you begin? How do you create a sense of safety and confidence when talking about threats to your core identity as a Jew?

Lynne Azarchi and Harlene Galen Lichter are two educator-researchers who have been involved with combatting racism, bias and antisemitism for decades. They recently published Countering Antisemitism and Hate: A Guidebook for Youth, Parents, and Educators. The two are now running workshops and webinars for concerned adults, empowering them with the practical tools needed to conduct these discussions and help everyone fight back safely.

I had the opportunity to seek their advice and wish to share their wisdom.

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How did you get involved with training others to combat antisemitism?

Lynne is active in a number of Jewish organizations in her. Years, ago, she conducted a listening session for the Greater Princeton Jewish community under the auspices of her local Federation’s JCRC. We heard that antisemitic incidents were increasing; Jewish youth were suffering shame and trauma, and that parents and educators did not know what to do. We have decades of experience working with youth by creating educational training programs about anti-bias, anti-racism and against antisemitism. Through our organization Kidsbridge Youth Center in New Jersey and Jewish Upstanders, we have worked with over 35,000 children and hundreds of teachers.

We have conducted extensive research and have evidence-based strategies that students – together with their families – can learn, practice and use to feel more prepared in these situations.

David Harris, the former CEO of the American Jewish Committee, said that affirming Jewish identity, Zionism and pro-Israelism requires not just confidence in the facts, but also a heavy dose of social courage. If we are counting on young people to stand up, voice themselves, and be heard, then we have to help prepare them for the various situations in which they may find themselves.

What are some trends that you have seen in the past few years?

Ever since the COVID pandemic, the robustness of civil in-person communication has significantly declined. Interpersonal relationship skills had already been weakened by the preference for social media over more traditional communication, especially amongst young adults and teenagers. Social distancing, while helpful to curb the pandemic, enabled people to lose the restraints of accountability and morality with regards to communication.

The result is an explosion of online expressions of biases that were previously kept out of public discourse. This has gradually led to the normalization of hate remarks, and has led to acts of violence against marginalized groups including Jews.

What can children and families do to keep safe and empower themselves?

Skills can be taught to Jewish youth to fight bias effectively. Our research shows that the earlier that parents take on strategies of empathy, identity and empowerment, the better off their families will be – equipped with interactive activities that enhance ally and activist practice.

Moreover, it’s important to realize that youngsters learn mostly from observing what adults do, not from what their parents and educators say. Adults who model feeling safe and empowering behavior have a stronger positive impact. For example, adults can use differing calming strategies and practice them with youngsters until they can do them easily – this is paramount.

Calming one’s mind and body is powerful in providing courage and clarity to act safely in antisemitic situations. Using assertive behaviors like body language that presents a balance of strength and relaxation; direct eye contact; combined with an acceptive facial expression; and spoken words that are clear, confident and respectful, all have a positive effect and should be modeled by parents.

We encourage families to form a T.E.A.M.(Together Eradicate Antisemitism Momentum) in which they dedicate time to listen to each other, and practice responses and strategies that are effective. Only through repeated practice will these responses become more comfortable and natural.

Cyberbullying can be vicious and it seems out of control. What can kids and parents do about it?

Yes, cyberbullying and antisemitism via social media are really toxic. Parents must include and engage their kids to make their online time safe and positive. Discuss it head-on. Let them know they might see stereotypes, tropes and hate. Encourage them to take screenshots and share them with you. Children and teens will feel they are making a contribution.

Grown-ups who receive screenshot can discuss them openly. Why is the post or meme incorrect? When/how did the stereotype or trope develop? Adults who do not know the answers can research the topic together with the child, and discuss their findings together with the family or class.

Parents and educators can also talk about what being Jewish means to their child. Feeling a sense of pride in one’s Jewish identity is vital, because we all need to know what we are standing up for and why it’s important to us. To that end, consider attending a rally together to push back against antisemitism and other bias. Other family activities can be writing a letter to your Congress person together or exploring what curricula or programs are being offered in your child’s school against antisemitism, hate and other bias.

In your book, you discuss the importance of strengthening our ethnic identity. How can families begin that journey?

Research informs us that a child starts to develop ethnic self-identity at age three. An early start doesn’t guarantee that youth will immediately feel comfortable with their identity, so it’s important to have consistency and positive expressions of Jewishness that bring you and your children joy and pride.

Do you want your child to feel more confident? Ask yourself how Jewishness is expressed in your family. What can we do to cultivate a more positive Jewish identity amongst our loved ones? Start to build a sense of empowerment together with your child: join the PJ Library and start reading Jewish children’s books at bedtime and on Shabbat, support Jewish causes, participate in an event at your local synagogue or JCC, watch YouTube channels with Jewish educational content, support the work of Jewish authors and artists, actively support Israelis who are visiting your community. These are just a few suggestions.

How can we collaborate with the security authorities if we experience an incident of antisemitism or other bias?

Thousands of antisemitic and bias crimes and incidents are not reported. Most of us act like bystanders, afraid to “stand up and speak out.”  Some adults, kids, schools, and communities are fearful of drawing attention to themselves.

Why bother to report? Because you are role modeling for your children, friends, and neighbors that you are taking an active role to highlight a problem that must be addressed. A report tells the school, police, and FBI that there are incidents and crimes in the community that demand immediate attention. It is critical for Jews that an accurate assessment of antisemitism be tallied, shared, and discussed so all of us can look bias straight in the face and attack the causes and roots of tropes, discrimination, and stereotypes. When you report, you become a part of the proactive system to stop hate and bias.

Lynne and Harlene are available for workshops and webinars. For more information about their work, visit www.jewishupstanders.org or purchase a copy of Countering Antisemitism & Hate: A How-to Guide for Youth, Families and Educators, now available on Amazon or in Barnes & Noble.