I can’t get you out of my mind

You know how in the movies after *insert name here* breaks up with *insert name here* and they’re sitting on their couch scooping out from what must be the 5th pint of ice cream and just getting started with no signs of stopping. They pine for the person, cry a lot, everything reminds them of their Ex and there is no sign of happiness for them in the near future. But suddenly great music is played and they get their life together and in like 3 minutes they are a completely different person; heartbreak free.

So I guess you could say that I’ve gone through the breakup stage but its been 1 month and 20 days since I’ve left my precious Israel and no matter how many tubs of ice cream I consume (that number will not be discussed) I can’t get her out of my mind. She knew how to comfort me when I was feeling down and somehow she was able to make me smile with all the wonderful people she brought into my life. I used to and still do adore her. I’ve become those crazy french romantics who get into a drunken stopper over that jolie fille they saw reading in the park. However the difference between me and the lovesick Parisian is that he wakes up, slightly hungover, and then he’s fine, off to look for the next girl, where as I’m stuck on this one and can’t seem to forget her.

Oh Israel, my beautiful country. Your rolling mountains are the most beautiful things I have ever seen and to watch your lights at night take me back to when I was a kid and had a star lamp that when turned on, projected beautiful lights onto my wall. Those lights made me feel calm and safe as they bounced of my walls at different angles and sizes. I could stare at them for days. Your perfume was like no other I had ever smelled in my life and I can’t seem to find it in any boutique. Oh what I would do to just smell your fresh scent one more time.

So if I were in a movie it would be right about now that some pumping music would play and I would get up and get over this “phase” as others like to call it. But if I may suggest, let’s play a mellower tune like “Be Okay” by Ingrid Michelson because although I no longer get to see my Israel on a daily basis, a long distance relationship can’t be all that bad right? I mean couples do it all the time! I’ve began to see the beauty in everything I see in this country that I live in now, and have you, Israel, to thank for that. You opened my eyes to a world of significance and purpose. I see you in the fresh blades of grass I walk by daily and the bright colourful flowers I pass. I see you in the sunset I see while jogging and I stand in awe as I’m suddenly transported back to when I watched the sunset in Tel Aviv. I see you everywhere. I may have left, but you know what they say “You can take the girl out of the country but you can’t take the country out of the girl” (I took some artistic licence there). I guess you can cue some Ahavat Israel BaNeshama right now as I walk into the sunset and the credits begin to role for I have found a moment of pure content; that I was never broken to begin with, I was just forgetful. I never lost her, my one and only Israel was with me all along.

About the Author
Shira Perton was born in Houston Texas and is currently studying in Midreshet HaRova in the Old City of Jerusalem. She aspires to become a person of integrity who stands strong to her beliefs and morals.