If You’re Angry and You Know It Clap Your Hands?

Shakespeare undoubtedly knew and was inspired by this week’s Torah portion.

Let’s focus on one line that I think most people miss. I think it teaches one of the most important lessons in the Torah.

Try asking this at your table: Why is he clapping his hands?

Everyone knows, “If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands!”

Who claps their hands when angry?

Many years ago I was in Paris and decided I should go see an opera. It was at the historic Bastille Opera House and the star was a Spanish soprano. I didn’t think he was that good, but the crowd thought different. When the final curtain call came, they booed! They let him know how unhappy they were with his performance! I have never seen anything like that in my life, neither before nor since.

I assure you, no one was clapping! Who claps when they’re angry?

Balak’s clapping I think comes from his sense of dignity. He’s a dignitary and has a certain decorum to uphold. He’s clapping because he’s trying to avoid losing his temper.

This scene is so theatrical, I’m sure it inspired many scripts throughout history.

Let’s say you find yourself getting angry with your spouse or your parent or your child or your sibling. You’ve got all this angry energy that you want to release.

Would you just get angry, or would you control yourself?

How about someone who has internalized the Torah teaching that losing one’s temper is akin to idolatry — i.e., very bad. But the anger is so strong you feel like punching someone. What do you do?

Some people might go punch a pillow. What if there’s no pillow around?

Would you perhaps just punch yourself, i.e., clap your hands?

Would that look silly? What would be worse, losing your temper or clapping your hands and risking looking strange?

The lesson I take from Balak is maintaining your dignity and not losing your temper is so important that it would be better to look strange to people than to lose control.

And if you express your anger by clapping your hands, maybe they’ll just think you’re happy.

Who is truly strong? Someone who has self-control. (Avot 4:1)

Shabbat Shalom