It’s Like Facebook for Jihadists

Maybe it’s because I am South African. But I need help and I am convinced that the Israel high tech industry could provide much needed solutions. Over the last few years we have seen this vital sector solving traffic problems, curing scores of medical ailments and adding untold functionality to just about every aspect of our deepening mobile lives. And now it’s time for them to simplify the crowded terrorist space in the Middle East. We need an app to explain to us who is who, and who they support. (We already know who they don’t — so that is covered). And we need some kind of social environment in which they can operate.

This brainwave came to me this morning after hearing that today’s unsuccessful rocket from Gaza was claimed by Answar Bayt al Maqdis, also known as the Sinai Province of the Islamic State. I had never heard of them, but they apparently appose Hamas rule is Gaza and are leading an insurgency against the Egyptians in the Sinai. Which makes it perfectly logical (to no one) for them to launch rockets against Israel in their fight against the Egyptians.

And it’s almost daily that we encounter a new splinter group or a splinter of a splinter. We have no idea if they are against or are supporters of the other terrorist organisations such as Hamas, if they are funded by Iran (or still waiting for the delivery — postage in the Gaza area being what it is), and if they are Isis affiliates. It’s become a take a number and wait your turn for terrorists in Gaza and it’s a wonder that they even have the time to acquire a spade, let alone dig a tunnel with all it takes to start a new groups. The admin must be killing them.

I imagine that there is some kind of Gazan register — or should be. Name reservations at least should be tightly controlled and whereas of course no one should be able to copyright universal words like Islamic or State or Jihad, the combinations of those words should be protected, so that Islamic Jihad State for example might well be different to Jihad Islamic State. If you get my drift.

Flags, colours, balaclavas, should also be protected by Gazan by-laws, so that when a rocket eventually does manage to limp over the fence (before being taken down by the Iron Dome), at least we won’t have everyone and their sister (okay, not their sister) claiming responsibility. In short, the industry is ripe for consolidation and who better to achieve this than Israel’s high tech industry.

There is also room for a social media platform. It must be pretty lonely being a Jihadist — waiting for the eventual virgins and so a little companionship never killed anyone. Think of it as Facebook for Jihadists. With a few exception — there will only be an “Unlike” icon — because I can’t imagine that any self-respecting terrorists likes pretty much anything.

I imagine that one would also only have a “Non-friend” option as “Friending” can’t be too much in demand in the region. But it’s important to note that the functionality of un-friending a “Non friend” doesn’t make them a friend. It’s like a re-tweet is not an endorsement, but in a Gazan sort of way.

The success of the start up nation has been the identification of complexities within a sector and solution based approach to problem solving. The terrorist segment is in desperate need for assistance, and I couldn’t think of anyone better equipped to take advantage of this need.