Premature Ejaculation

In a recent re-reading of “A Tale of Two Cities” by Charles Dickens, I was both startled and amused to note the repeated use of the word “ejaculate”. On further examination, in the Oxford Dictionary Online, I discovered that indeed the word originates from the late 16th century from Latin: ejaculat – darted out from the verb ejaculari from e- (variant of ex-) out + jaculari to dart (from jaculum dart, javelin, from jacere to throw)

Pronunciation /ɪˈdʒakjʊleɪt/ “Say something quickly and suddenly: ‘That will do!’ he ejaculated’”

So, there you go. Why is this relevant? Well it seems that the further Israeli leadership wades into the ultra-nationalist zone, the more desire, lust, passion, adolescent obsession has brought the country to a fever of just such ejaculation: a chorus of competitive premature ejaculators reigning a golden shower of hope in sudden iteration.

The Israeli ultra-right is in the midst of a dream so sweet, they have lost all sense of proportion, direction and basic adult restraint. Ejaculation (as described above of course) of the word “settlements”, “annexation” and repeated ejaculation of the word “now!…now! now!” brings us to the conclusion that their interpretation of the situation is such that while the new resident in the While House still knows little (Urban Dictionary – “eff-all”) about the Israeli-Palestinian problem, this is the time to seize the moment: annex, settle, grab, and retroactively legalize. Now.

In another reading of the work by Daniel Kahneman, “Thinking Fast and Slow,” the author refers to several experiments that may be worth noting. In an effort to measure instinctive intuitive forces in the brain (system one) in comparison to measured logical thinking (system two), the researchers presented a questionnaire to students regarding sexual habits and mores. They answered in a measured mature fashion. The same students were then asked to answer the same questionnaire after arousal. Oh dear, some perverse and unexpected results from respectable folk resulted. Conclusion: when focused in logical thinking, (system two) the analytic driver in the brain reached a calculated answer. However, when aroused and passionate, (system one), the instant non-thinking driver took the student to perversions and fetishes that they had not reckoned before.

Our national brain, stimulated by our very own home-grown religious alt-right has thrown the nation into arousal and fantasy: grab, settle, and annex. The source of arousal? Well in the case of the students, it was simply porn. But here it takes the form of yellow hair, a painted face, a red tie and a perverted ego, now occupying the White House. He is “one of ours”: he doesn’t waste time thinking too much. He does stuff. In Israel we call it “creating facts on the ground”. And while yellow-hair beams his warm rays of friendship in our direction, we can, like the spoilt favorite child, do anything and everything we wish to.

Kahneman describes another experiment worth noting. Participants were asked to count passes by players on a basketball court. A woman dressed in a gorilla suit walks through the court during the counting. Of those who counted correctly, most by far failed to notice the woman in the gorilla suit. This is called “Inattentional Blindness”.

The following criteria are required to classify an event as an inattentional blindness episode: 1) the observer must fail to notice a visual object or event, 2) the object or event must be fully visible, 3) observers must be able to readily identify the object if they are consciously perceiving it,…^[3]

For example, if a country were to rule another nation, which then becomes the majority, and if it were to separate its inhabitants into Bantustans; promise them independence but never allow it; exploit their labor; take their land; talk down to them – the word “apartheid” might be frequently used to describe such a country almost anywhere it turned. But if the country’s leadership is so focused on settlements, more settlements, counting settlement expansion projects, appeasing settlers, it would never notice the word “apartheid” – or worry about it. The gorilla in the room is apartheid.

And yet still, in another book I’m currently reading by Philip Roth, the author describes a circle of young adolescent males who actually reward the premature ejaculator, (ejaculation as described above of course, “saying something quickly and suddenly”, such as: “Aaaah!, Yessss! OMG”).

Conclusions

• There is a gorilla in the room that no one notices
• We are not alone. We resemble a fictional group of adolescents from the last century created by Philip Roth
• There is a yellow hair-implant in the White House on top of a brain in perpetual system one
• Premature ejaculation in its local form is the current manifestation of a disease contracted fifty years ago, in 1967
• Stop reading books. We are in the age of ignorance.

It’s gonna be great, folks. Really great. Trust me.

“That will do!”