One doesn’t say to someone injured in traffic while not wearing a safety belt, not wearing a helmet or talking on their mobile: you asked for it. First of all, it doesn’t help saying so. Further, it’s cruel to say so. And last but not least, we don’t blame a victim. However, when pleading for more road safety, one needs to include calls upon the public to act safer.
This comparison came to mind when I read an activist plea for the case of chained women.
We shouldn’t blame victims but we also should not refrain from calling upon the public to always sign a prenup, when things still look rosy.
In the Jewish US, this is quite the norm already by now. In Israel, one third of the Jews doesn’t even marry inside the framework of Jewish and Civil Law. But the two third that does and has a State-approved marriage ceremony must be called upon to sign a prenuptial agreement.
OK, the couple is in love and naive. It should be. And the woman has been conditioned to obey and not ask questions. Centuries-old tradition. But where are the rabbis, parents, the sibs, the uncles and aunts, the friends and everyone else who cares? Why don’t they insist on what is common sense? If one of the partners doesn’t want a prenup, maybe the whole marriage with such a person is not such a good idea after all!
We all must insist on prenups becoming the norm.