Russian collusion delusion in a nutshell, Part 2

The Great American Witch-Hunter Robert Mueller indicted 12 Russians working for the GRU, Russian military intelligence, claiming that they meddled in the US election. In witch-hunts the accused are guilty with no chance of any trial, so Mueller is keeping alive a grand tradition.

His main point seems to be that the GRU hacked the DNC server and then supplied e-mails to WikiLeaks. This embarrassed the DNC because it showed how they rigged their primaries in favor of Hillary Clinton over rival Bernie Sanders. At that point Robby Mook, Hillary’s campaign manager, proclaimed that the Russians did this to benefit Trump and the Russian collusion delusion was born.

(Back in the early days of rock ‘n’ roll Honky Tonk Part 2 became the hit. That’s what inspired me to do the Russian Collusion Delusion In A Nutshell, Part 2. You can start to freewheel in Part 2. It worked for Bill Doggett.)

Note that during the election, no votes were tampered with to favor either candidate. Trump trailed badly the whole way; not one pundit gave him a chance. He pulled it out in key swing states by attracting disaffected Democratic working class voters. Sen. Durban (D-Ill) said 30 per cent of Obama voters switched to Trump. He won white women by 53 to 42 per cent even though he only did so-so in traditional Republican suburbs. Even if there were meddling by foreigners in the election, it had no effect on the outcome. We know there was meddling. Prince bin Salman of Saudi Arabia told a Jordanian newspaper in March that they had contributed $24 million to Hillary’s campaign despite her being a woman and there was lots more to come.

Mueller has already caused the US government to pay out more in compensation to innocents that he wronged than any American in history, probably, so he’s like a pig in mud wronging innocents in the witch-hunt. He let four men convicted of murder that he knew had been framed rot in prison. They got $100 million in compensation, two posthumously. He then dragged out an anthrax investigation for 10 years ignoring the obvious suspects and instead persecuted two innocent men, one after the other. One got $6 million; the other committed suicide. He has a paranoid aversion to Israel. At one point a consulting firm in Israel rose to the top of his suspects list, and if he had found anything at all he would have closed off the witch-hunt, saying, there you go, it wasn’t Russia after all, it was Israel. That’s what took me so long. In 2004, as FBI director, Mueller announced to the world that there was a massive Israeli spy ring operating out of the Pentagon. Jordan Schachter: “It later turned out that the allegations were completely bogus. There was no Israeli spy ring, but rather, what appeared to be a deliberate attempt to target Jews for prosecution.” This guy Mueller may very well be clinically insane.

You have a FBI investigation followed by a witch-hunt in search of a crime that never happened to pin on Trump. Peter Strozk, who headed the FBI segment, had so little to do that he spent all of his time exchanging e-mails with his paramour Lisa Page in numbers too many to count. Actual collusion with a foreign country is what Hillary did when she told the Haitian president René Préval to let her candidate Sweet Micky Martelly, a crook, run in the run-off of their election, or she would cut off US aid to Haiti. This was after 300,000 people died in an earthquake. Sweet Mickey won and as a result Hillary, husband, and their friends were enabled to steal hundred of millions of their aid money from the Haitians. Don’t believe me, ask the Haitians. “Hillary” has become a dirty word in their French, which translated means: “black lives don’t matter.” Marguerite Laurent, lawyer and poet: “Donald Trump, arguably a bigot and perhaps a sexist, still clearly has less of a record of lies, looting, lawlessness, and implementing systemic governmental/institutional racism than Hillary Clinton.” Bernard Sansaricq, former president of the Haitian Senate: “The Clintons exploited this terrible disaster to steal billions of dollars from the sick and starving people of Haiti. The world trusted the Clintons to help the Haitian people during their most desperate time of need and they were deceived.”

The Mueller GRU list stands or falls on whether Russians hacked the DNC as claimed by the company CrowdStrike or was it Guccifer 2.0 who did it, passed them on to Seth Rich, who passed them on to Gavin MacFayden, at WikiLeaks. CrowdStrike reduced Guccifer 2.0 to a persona, manipulated by the GRU, so he would not get in the way of their narrative. But this is Russian intelligence, not stupidity. If they were going to choose a persona as a ruse, they would not choose a Romanian-inspired name; they’d go Chinese.

Guccifer 2.0 is a very interesting fellow if you read the speech he delivered in absentia to a cybersecurity conference in London, his correspondence with former model-actress Robin Young, and his own WordPress site. He took his sobriquet in honor of his hero, Romanian hacker Guccifer, now in prison, Marcel Lazar, who made his name supplying to WikiLeaks the e-mails of Sidney Blumenthal, Hillary’s fixer, when he was conspiring to stampede her into a war in Libya so he could make a profit on it.

Guccifer 2.0 made the point on his site that all the super-hackers in the world are Russians. Someone else compared them to the pirates in the days of  Elizabeth I in England. You never know what flag they are flying under, Russian or the skull and crossbones.

Here’s one of their capers. In August 2016 Russian hackers in what was called the “worst security debacle” ever in the US, stole cyberweapon tools from the National Security Agency (NSA). Then a hustler offered them back, did a bait-and-switch, and picked the pocket of the CIA for $100,000. The bottom line is that those with a smidgen of talent don’t waste time on elections. There is too much valuable stuff to be stolen. (Yahoo Finance reported that the Mossad apparently watched the theft of the cyberweapon tools in real time.)

Guccifer 2.0 pointed out that Kaspersky Labs in Russia, also a global company, used the prowess of Russian hackers as an advertising pitch, saying that they are the only antivirus company that can cope with them.

During his speech in absentia in London, reported by Forbes, Guccifer 2.0 told how he was able to hack the DNC server. He said the software they were using was full of holes and if anyone should shoulder the blame for the breach it’s Stu Trevelyan, the CEO of the company which sold the DNC the holey moley.

It is obvious that CrowdStrike supplied Mueller with the ocean of technical data to make the case against the GRU. Everyone, even those hip to tech, has to accept all this verbiage on faith. There is no way anyone can check anything. But what I am saying, actually singing, when I squint at what is supposed to be their tapestry, knowing nothing about tech beyond where the button is located that I have to press to turn on the computer, is that the king is in his altogether, his altogether, his altogether. CrowdStrike has created a musical. Everyone else is on stage now from coast-to-coast singing something quite different about the GRU indictments, “Isn’t it grand! Isn’t it fine! Look at the cut, the style, the line!”

You have to remember that CrowdStrike is a hoax machine. Hoaxing is what they do. There are three possibilities where all this incriminating data came from, even stripping his mother of Guccifer 2.0 and turning him into a persona. The possibility of the first goes under the category of likely and the second and third go under of category of remote.

I’ll do the second first. In December 2016 Russia arrested three high-ranking intelligence officers, not in the GRU, and one private citizen for spying for US intelligence. The private citizen was Ruslan Stoyanov, head of Kaspersky Labs investigations unit. This raises the possibility that perhaps one was working with CrowdStrike to invent the damning data on the GRU. They are charged with treason. Although you are back in 2016 CrowdStrike had much of the stuff in the bag then and they could just paint by numbers after that. Two of the three spooks that I examined were high up in domestic intelligence, the FSB, successor to the KGB, characters you want to populate any spy thriller.

Dmitri Dokuchaev was a major-general in the FSB. For years he was freelancing, making up to $30,000 a month stealing money from bank cards and whatever caught his fancy, including attacking US government infrastructure. Then the FSB said you work for us. He did that yes and also allegedly spied for the Americans but didn’t miss a beat in his merry life of crime. On March 17, 2017 Dokuchaev was put on the FBI Most Wanted List for being part of group that stole 500 million Yahoo e-mail accounts from January 2014 to December 2016. Yahoo should a letter of thanks to the Russians, Russians, Russians, from making this go away in December 2016.

But the next guy, his immediate superior, is even more incredible. His name, the Russians were led to believe, was Col. Sergey Mikhailov. They found $12 million in cash in his home — this is a government employee — and only then discovered he has no personal history. It’s like he materialized out of thin air, the perfect mole. He also did work with the hacker group Anonymous. Maybe they named it after him.

We move on to scenario three. Kurtz’s partner Dmitri Alperovitch is in tight with the all who’s who in the Ukraine. This sets up the potential that Ukrainian intelligence wrote the script. The only target that they would consider doing this for in the entire universe is the GRU. These countries are in a state of war and to cause trouble for Putin with the Americans would be a glorious achievement. Sometimes the pen is mightier than the sword.

But Kurtz is the man, a virtuoso in hoaxing. He could compose what needs to be composed blindfolded. Let’s see how he worked when called in to identify a hacker circa 2015 and walked away with his hefty sum selling the client a bill of goods that the hacker was Hurricane Panda. He could have said Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck. It’s all the same.

This was posted in 2015, a short biography of Kurtz. This guy is too technical for me, but I stripped it down without I hope losing anything in the stripping.

Josh Weider: “George Kurtz has quite the resume. Perhaps you remember the time he spent at McAfee, a company founded by a drug-addled heavily-armed lunatic and maybe murderer whose recent contributions to infosec include being one of the handful of companies to use BSAFE encryption library in their products, the library famously back-doored by government security contractors/prostitutes RSA for a National Security Agency cheque in the amount of $10 million.

“Or perhaps you are more familiar with his time as chief financial officer of General Motors, whose flagship ‘IT’ product, OnStar, is best known to actual security researchers as the government tracking device that allows police to disable your car remotely and quite likely kill you in the process. Did I say police? Because I meant basically anybody who has a computer and can read. And did I say disable? Because I also meant unlock the car and start the engine.

“George Kurtz is to the information technology community what Bull Connor was to the civil rights community. Which is to say: not helpful.”


“This post isn’t about the general tomfoolery that Mr. Kurtz engages in. No, this is about a specific series of ridiculous claims made by Kurtz and parroted from the rooftops by Fortune magazine, like this:

“‘CEO and co-founder George Kurtz tells it like this: A besieged customer needed backup. So Kurtz’s team sent in reinforcements, placed its cloud-based software sensors across the breached business’s computing environment, and started gathering intel. Aha! Investigators spotted Hurricane Panda, an old Chinese nemesis that Kurtz’s crew had been battling since 2013. What happened next surprised them: When the attackers scanned an infected machine only to find traces of CrowdStrike, they fled.’”

“In two paragraphs in the article, the word ‘cloud’ appears in every sentence. Replacing the word ‘cloud’ with a word like ‘sorcery’ provides a clearer understanding of the three card Monte game that Kurtz and people like him play with competency.”

“Investigators spotted Hurricane Panda, an old Chinese nemesis that Kurtz’s crew had been battling since 2013.”

“This is where the real problems begin to start. The problem is this simple and straightforward. ‘Hurricane Panda’ does not exist.’”

“Ridiculous claims” is the epithet that will be put on  Kurtz’s tombstone. Then everyone will be able find him easily.

These are the villains who have ganged up on Trump, who have been nominated for the new and coveted Dr. Strangelove Award for their contributions into hastening a nuclear war between the US and Russia. The sponsors – I think Carl (Meathead) Reiner is the chairman — got the idea after watching Hillary gift Putin vast resources of uranium in Kazakhstan along with 20 per cent of US uranium. And that that plus a reset button, bigger than Kim Jong Un’s button. But none of this does any good to cure the greatest threat to humanity, global warming, unless Putin presses the button and so this award was established to encourage him to get on with it.

Here are the candidates for this year’s Dr. Strangelove Award.

= John Brennan. He a Commie who snuck into the CIA during the Cold War, and has done more to accomplish the Soviet goal of damaging the US government than any other Commie in history. Seymour Hersh called the Russian collusion delusion nothing more than a “Brennan disinformation operation.” And he doesn’t clam up either. That may get him the award.

= Peter Strozk. He was put in charge of the Russian collusion delusion three months before the election, plenty of time to determine there was no collusion, walk away, and let Trump have a fresh start, the same as all other presidents. But then he went shopping at Walmart in south Virginia and was overcome by the stink of the Trump voters. At that point he rededicated himself to make America fragrant again and held the fort until the witch-hunt could taken over.

= Robert Mueller. He’s got the inside track because he is exactly what a Dr. Strangelove should be. Nuts.

= George Kurtz. He needs this more than the rest to shake off his reputation as the Bull Connor of the IT world. He scored a great coup in damaging Trump’s attempts to give peace a chance with Russia. And that’s all Trump was saying in his meeting with Putin. But while Kurtz’s frame-up of the GRU is pretty good, it’s not perfect. If I understand it correctly he’s got a breach of an electoral database in Illinois attributed to the GRU. But everyone by now knows that this was done by either a Dutchman or a Scandinavian using a server provider located in Siberia near the Mongolian border and the operator, Vladimir Fomenko, and he’s only 26, won’t shut up about it because they still own him $290. Kurtz is always trying to slip stuff through like that.

For a limited time only my offer still stands to sell anyone a deed to the Brooklyn Bridge who actually believes that the GRU tried to meddle in the US election. With Russians I concur that the flag doesn’t always tell you anything unless they actually run up the skull and crossbones. But if you believe, you believe, and any errors are on my conscience.

About the Author
Dov Ivry is from the Maritimes in Canada, born in Nova Scotia, raised in New Brunswick. He worked as a journalist there for 20 years with a one-year stop at the Gazette in Montreal. He's been hanging out in Israel for 36 years, doing this and that, and managed to produce 66 books.