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Gary Epstein
And now for something completely different . . .

Take Back The Street

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You can’t help but get a sinking feeling in your stomach when you watch the rallies on TV. All those haters, in masks and keffiyehs, waving Palestinian flags, shouting slogans about genocide, throwing rocks, chanting “from the river to the sea.”  There are so many of them.  And they are so loud.  And so wrong.

But how is the world to know?

Our puny counter-demonstrations, even the huge feel-good one in Washington, and the recent one in New York, seem so timid and well-behaved, as though we were striving for the Miss Congeniality award, rather than the passions, hearts and minds of an undecided world.  Need we be so decorous?  Do we think that we will prevail if we leave behind less litter and politely thank the cops on duty?  Look, world, we broke no windows.  Love us.

And our signs:  They are very neat.  We color inside the lines.  They have no triggering words.  They are genteel and inoffensive.  עם ישראל חי.  Am yisrael chai.  יחד ננצח.  Yachad nenatzeach.  Bring the hostages home.  Let them go.  Set them free. They are not designed to attract the cameras that will display to the world the emotions in our hearts or in the street.  They don’t convey the depth of the passions we are feeling as we see our beloved homeland maligned and its very existence threatened, our daughters and sisters raped, our babies snatched from loving arms.

What happened to Jewish spontaneity and creativity?  Do we not have access to amplified audio equipment, bullhorns, memorable phrases on posters that resonate in the minds of viewers?  Aren’t we capable of shouting down a bunch of keffiyeh-wearing dolts with masks covering their mouths?  And can’t we come up with better slogans than theirs?

I’m not the most creative or clever guy in the world.  But I spent a few minutes imagining some well-placed electronic boom boxes along the route of the next march of the Jewish Voice for Palestine, blasting at a zillion decibels things like:

Hey you morons marching in the plaza, Hamas is causing starvation in Gaza–[OR Hamas started the war in Gaza]

Hamas, Hezbollah, hey, hey, hey; How many kids did you rape today?

Hamas, Hezbollah, PFLP; When they are gone, Gaza will be free

Hamas, Haniyah, Yahya Sinwar; Hiding in tunnels like the rats they are

Hamas, Hezbollah, JVP, and ISIS; Can’t you Fix the Honor Killing Crisis?

Feminists and Queers, Stop The Distortion; Hamas Hates Gays and Bans Abortion

Support Hamas and the Arab Nation; Get Honor Killing and Female Genital Mutilation

Queers For Palestine, Quite An Error; Gays in Gaza Live in Terror

“I Kid You Not,” Come to Jesus, Joe; Make Them Let The Hostages Go

Rapists, Kidnapers, Forces of Evil; Live in Tunnels and Starve Your People

Who Rapes Girls and Kidnaps Kids; Hamas Terrorists–Worse Than Pigs

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I am confident that you all can outdo me. Avoid profanity.  Record it on a thousand CDs.  Play it loud on boomboxes, everywhere they go.  Carry signs with the words, so the cameras will pick it up.  Stay safe–find yourself a place near the police or amidst a friendly crowd.  Or a second story window or windows. And drown them out.  Let the words “how many kids did you rape today?” become part of their identity in the public mind.

They can’t stand the truth.  They don’t like being associated with terror, rape, and kidnaping.  That is why they tear the posters down.  So force them to confront the reality of their association with and allegiance to monsters.

Film at 11.

About the Author
Gary Epstein is a retired teacher and lawyer residing in Modi'in, Israel. He was formerly the Head of the Global Corporate and Securities Department of Greenberg Traurig, an international law firm with an office in Tel Aviv, which he founded and of which he was the first Managing Partner. He and his wife Ahuva are blessed with 18 grandchildren, ka"h, all of whom he believes are well above average. [Update: . . . and, ka"h, one great-grandchild.] He currently does nothing. He believes he does it well.