Talking to true believers

I’ve been exposed to all sorts of belief systems in my life. It’s normal to me but, turns out, there are people who don’t share my experiences. They mostly, sometimes only, live in a social circle sharing their beliefs. To me, that feels like a parallel universe, when I meet someone raised in a group, or even a cult, from birth. Sure, we’re all exposed to religions and so on, but I’m talking about people raised in specific belief systems. In communities that they leave when they go to work, or pay taxes, but other than that, they don’t interact with the outside world that much.

I can tell with ease, I might be wrong, of course, one can never know with full certainty, who’s a true believe in a particular religion, a cause, what have you. Who isn’t a mere opportunist faking his or her belief for better career options or romantic options. One develops a sense with more and more experience. It’s not something that can be taught. Only life experience gives us that superpower, if you will.

As one rabbi said in a video I’ve watched, ”It’s in their eyes.” Indeed, it is. Also, the way they talk, what they talk about and their eyes when they talk about it, the language they use (specific words that others don’t really use or not in the same way) – these are good indicators whether we deal with true believers or not.

One’s job plays an important part, too. Some jobs require us to interact with a limited number of people who share our belief system, while some jobs require us to interact with people from all walks of life. You’re talking to a devout Catholic one minute, only to switch to a militant atheist the next. A lot of people are so stuck in their belief system that they can’t see the world from different points of view, even if these points of view are obviously imperfect.

Now, the ones who, like me, are agnostic when it comes to how the world works, are sometimes accused of being capable of believing anything. That we meander between beliefs, never declaring what we believe. Well, it’s not that. Agnostics are highly skeptical. Just because they talk to someone doesn’t mean they buy into that person’s belief system. They are having a conversation, out of courtesy, curiosity or self-interest. Agnostics don’t disclose what they believe in, unless they have no choice.

Some people out there demand to know what our beliefs are and if these people happen to be important to us in some respects, well, then there’s no other way but to reveal what we believe, or tell them the version we think they want to hear. Most people aren’t fanatics (though the way things are going in the world, fanaticism might indeed become the new normal) and they won’t demand to know what we believe in, much less persecute us for our beliefs.

Now, with true believers, it gets tricky. Some true believers are extremely dangerous and it doesn’t take a genius to tell (jihadis, for example, don’t exactly hide their intent what they want to do to religious minorities and anyone who doesn’t believe in the divine truth, as they call it). Some true believers are going to confront you openly but they won’t resort to physical violence. Verbal abuse, nothing more. Then, there are those who appear nice at first but when you get pulled into their group, they become more controlling, more demanding, and abusive. They wear a mask because they don’t want to spook you. Finally, there are those who are completely devoted to their cause but they understand it’s their personal crusade and they don’t expect others to share their views. They are fine with it and treat exchanges of views as a way to grow rather than a confrontation.

I recently talked with a true believer in heaven and hell – the believer who denies purgatory exists because it isn’t Biblical, or so she fervently believes. We talked about the concept of social media from hell. A damned soul can use social media, while given a different identity as a cover, and interact with people who are alive. Why? The damned soul can then taste the life that was lost and is never coming back. Only as a simulacrum on social media. If the soul starts making claims about being in hell, well, who’s going to believe in such silly stories, anyway? Even if someone does, what are they going to do? If the soul tries to write a bad word, that word’s going to get deleted or rejected by editors, while others using bad words are only going to offend the damned soul. Teasing material, right there.

”Sounds like the perfect torture to me,” the woman said, much to my surprise, as, clearly, the idea of such hell isn’t Biblical at all. Even true believers can surprise us with their sense of humor.