I have written about my struggles in the dating world of Israel in the past. And I say “dating world of Israel” because dating in Israel is a lot different than dating in the United States. Some aspects of dating are great, but other aspects are a definite adjustment.
If you travel into Tel Aviv, you’ll find plenty of clubs and bars where you can find other singles looking to meet someone new.
One thing I did like is that there’s no need to overdress. If you have ever been overseas before, you know that dressing up changes from one country to the next. Italy, for example, might as well be a fashion contest, with a majority of people dressing exceptionally well wherever they go.
Tel Aviv is a bit different. People are nicely dressed and well-groomed, but it’s also acceptable to go out in sneakers and jeans. Men benefit from women not putting on globs of makeup, too. The atmosphere is far more relaxed, which is nice.
And in the States, the approach that Israelis take to dating can often be seen as rude.
It took me some time before I realized that people were being direct rather than rude to me. Being straightforward means that a woman will give you her number if she’s interested, and men are often seen asking a girl they don’t know out for coffee. I have heard that this direct attitude also makes it easier to break up with a person.
There’s less of the guilt when dating, and that is refreshing.
On dating websites, especially OKCupid, you’ll find a lot of potential matches. As a man, you are expected to send the first message. Responses seem to happen after 10 or more messages are sent, so you have to be patient and not “fall” for the first person you message. It truly is a numbers game.
Tel Aviv’s dating scene is also odd. You should not expose your real intentions, and it’s not uncommon for a person to not message you the next day to say that they had a good time. In fact, I almost get the impression that you should text the person the next day because dating can be a “game.”
Emotional investments should be kept until you’ve been dating the person for quite some time. Tel Aviv’s dating scene doesn’t seem to be built on long-term relationships. There are a lot of people looking to just have fun rather than get into a serious commitment.
Even if you think that you’re in a serious commitment, the other person may not think so.
Meeting people through friends can work very well. When you meet friends of friends, the date seems more natural with a lot better chance of success.
Language barriers, which I have discussed in the past, have started to become less of a problem for me. I can hold conversations better than in the past, and this has led to much better success in the dating world. There is some interest in the “foreigner” in the room, but I have found being more proficient in Hebrew has helped me a lot though I am still unable to date anyone who isn’t proficient in English.