Thanksgiving – The Jewish Way 

As most Americans will be sitting around a Thanksgiving table today and sharing what we are grateful for, I’d like to address an interesting, nuanced idea about gratitude, and perhaps it’s something worth sharing at the table.

In this week’s Parsha, Yaakov takes two wives, Rachel and Leah. Leah, who was initially less favored by Yaakov than Rachel, is blessed with Yaakov’s first four sons. When she names her fourth son, Yehuda, she explains, “This time I will thank God.” The obvious question is: Why did she wait until the fourth son to give thanks? Furthermore, according to the Talmud, Leah’s thanks was the first time anyone had thanked God since Adam and Eve. How could this be? Surely Abraham and Sarah thanked God all the time. Didn’t Abraham tell his guests, “Don’t thank me, thank God”?

The Pardes Rimonim gives a beautiful explanation. Everyone before Leah praised God for the obvious good they enjoyed. Leah’s gratitude was an admittance that the hardships she had suffered were also for the good. She realized, with the birth of Yehuda, that she had the first four sons because she was the less favored wife. Yaakov had favored her less, so God favored her more.

Rabbi Akiva teaches us that “Kol man d’avad Rachmana, letav avid”—everything God does is for the good, even when, according to our narrow vision, it looks bad. “Hoda’ah” is not a regular appreciation of the good in our lives; it’s a deep, admittance-based gratitude for the hardships and struggles we might face.

“Tov L’hodot LaHashem”—it’s good to thank God. If we see everything as ultimately tov—good—then we can give thanks, “Hoda’ah,” to Hashem!