The Brothers’ Silence & Its Timeless Lesson

At the beginning of Parshas Vayigash, Yosef dramatically ended the saga with his brothers by revealing his identity to them: “I am Yosef” (Bereishis 45:3). His brothers “were unable to respond” to this and were silenced. Translators and commentators differ in explaining the cause for their silence, whether rooted in fear, surprise, or simply disconcertment. Rashi suggested that it was shame that silenced them, but does not specify the root of their shame, whether it was their guilt for the sale of Yosef or their doubting the meaning of his dreams. I believe that the simplest explanation for their shame is their inability to recognize the identity of their brother, Yosef, through this entire ordeal. While Rashi (Bereishis 42:8) cited the Midrash that explains that Yosef had grown a beard since they last saw him, this does not seem to sufficiently explain or justify their inability to recognize their own brother.

Yosef was simply never seen by his brothers. They never truly paid attention to him and never saw him for who he was. During the episode of the Sale of Yosef, it is conspicuous that the brothers never referred to Yosef by name. “Here comes the dreamer” (Bereishis 37:19) the brothers say. Yehuda refers to “our brother” (37:26, 27), Reuven refers to “the boy” (37:30), the brothers present “your son’s tunic” to their father (37:32), and their remaining references to Yosef utilize the pronoun “him”. Strikingly, the Torah, in narrating this episode, repeatedly refers to Yosef by name (37:23, 28, 29, 31), as if to rebuke the brothers for ignoring his identity. Yosef was essentially anonymous to the brothers and only existed in the way that he related to them.

When Yosef reveals himself to his brothers, he simply said, “I am Yosef” and the brothers were silenced in shame.

Strikingly, Vayigash concludes with a list of the 70 names of the members of Bnai Yisrael who descended to Egypt (46:8). The Torah takes this time to emphasize the importance of noticing each person by name. This seems to be a direct response to the failures of the brothers in their relationship to Yosef. In order to create a unified family/nation that is necessarily comprised of different people with different perspectives and different personalities, we must all see the humanity of each individual. We must understand that varying viewpoints and aspirations can be rooted in common values and humanity. Each person must be seen for who they are. Each person’s name accentuates their uniqueness, their humanity and their significance. Each person needs to be seen and recognized.

Our tradition offers a model of respectful dispute, as personified by Beis Hillel, who frequently disputed Beis Shamai. The Talmud (Eruvin 13b) concludes that we follow Beis Hillel because of their character and ethics in their approach to their debates. Beis Hillel would always articulate the views of Beis Shamai before offering their own opinion. They heard Beis Shamai and they saw Beis Shamai, even when they did not agree. They were not blinded by ego or small-mindedness and understood that other great people could justifiably see things differently.

The conflict of the brothers and Yosef foreshadowed the disunity and strife that has plagued the Jewish People since our inception- through the division of the Kingdoms during the First Beis HaMikdash, to the baseless internal hatred that was responsible for the destruction of the Second Beis HaMikdrash, until today. We must learn the lessons of this sin, and we should learn from the example of Beis Hillel and so many of our extraordinary ancestors to overcome our vulnerability and enable love, unity and humility to prevail.

In the Haftarah for Vayigash (Yechezkel 37), the prophet is told about the future redemption and is instructed to take two wooden branches and to write “for Yehudah and the Children of Israel” on one and “For Yosef, the branch of Ephraim and all of the children of Israel” and then he grafts these two branches into one. The message of this prophecy amplifies the message of Parshas Vayigash: we must see every member of our community, notice their individuality and their name, and then bring everyone together into one diversly strong unit.

The words of this prophecy could not be more relevant and inspiring for us, today.