Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews -- For those who like their news and truths frank and sharp

The perverted again accuse the family-orientated of being sinners

I would never blame anyone for being sex-obsessed. Not everyone has had the possibility to prepare themselves like responsible therapists, spending hundreds if not thousands of hours reviewing and crying over every memory of theirs connected to sexuality in any way at all and any hurt inflicted there. But I take a stern approach to people who’re obsessed by sex and still declare themselves a beacon of moral purity. The Vatican, again, has condemned same-sex marriage as inherently sinful. Wim Kan said sharply: If you don’t play the sport, you should stay out of the rules.

Two things about that first. One, don’t blame the regular Catholics. They, on average, do with their religion what it’s for. To choose virtue over vice, love of people over hating people, being a source of goodness. When I say any harsh words to the Vatican, I don’t mean all Catholics. Two, traditional Christian theology has been obsessed with suffering and sexuality. You don’t need to be Freud to understand why. But let’s be clear that they are obsessed with sex and they read others the riot act? Unacceptable!

Classical Christianity got into trouble when it encountered the Hellenist world where everything centered around sex, and the more the better. So, understandably, they chose to see sex as dirty and sinful, only sort-of-allowed for making kids. With due permission, these theologians need to consult their original teachers. They are still around. They call themselves Jews. And Jews teach that random uninhibited sex is not a vice because it’s dirty but because it’s a violation of its inherent holiness. Food is not meant for entertainment, but rather, for maintaining our health. In the same way, sex is not meant for pleasure but for cementing a relationship. And then the pleasure (of the food and the sex) is G^d’s bonus on a good deed, and not sinful (or addictive) at all. Jesus didn’t abstain from sex because it was sinful but because he wasn’t yet married. The Sages tell us that the High Priest cannot even go into the Holy of Holies on Yom Kippur if he’s not married. The Messiah must be married. It’s an important ritual obligation.

I think that I know why so many gay men recognize themselves in the story of King David and Prince Jonathan. Not because there is anything overtly mentioned about sexuality between them. Rather, it’s all about deep love. Love, not sexuality, lies at the core of any sexual relationship.

The main failure of the Vatican is that they are so full of sexual frustration (I would be too if I were told that sex is dirty and abstention is holy), that they take same-sex relationships as centered around sexuality. Almost anyone happily partnered knows the depth and importance of sexuality. How it solidifies the couple, as the Bible teaches us, glues us together. But, at the basis of the relationship lie friendship, respect, love, closeness, cooperation, sharing, mutual giving, loyalty, safety, encouragement, etc. Sex is vital but only works as far as the basics have been taken care of.

In Argentina, the current Pope had a Jewish friend and his intuition is right (expressed early in his papacy) not to condemn homosexuals or their natural need for a sexual relationship. He lacks support and a theological basis to introduce respect for homosexuals including their sexuality.

This Pope, after he was elected, said: May G^d forgive those who voted for me. He’s a naughty man who knows how to think for himself. If he wants, let him ask the Cardinals why Leviticus forbids lying with a man as with a woman but does not outlaw intercourse with an animal as with a human. Clearly, homosexual sex is only forbidden to heterosexuals (for whom it would not cement a relationship and their goal only would be temporary pleasure). Let him not tell them. Let them wrestle with it. Enjoy!

All this constant chatter by conservatives against premarital sex, abortion, homosexuality, and for celibacy are signs of sex-obsessed minds. There is no reason in the world a healthy homosexual woman or man should take any preaching from people confused and obsessed about relationships.

I left out all reports about sexual child abuse in the Church and reports of a homosexual subculture at the Vatican since they’re both also the result of the official anti-sexuality doctrine and only related to their unwillingness to recognize homosexual love relationships via the adjective scandalous.

About the Author
MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (, born in 1953 to two Dutch survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork, and holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam). He taught Re-evaluation Co-counseling, became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His most influential teachers (chronologically) are: his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim: Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. * Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he wrote hasbara for the Dutch public. His fields of attention now are varied: Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (statistics), Politics (Israel, the US and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight Truth), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), Ecology and Veganism. Sometimes he's misunderstood because he has such a wide vision that never fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what many love about him. Many of his posts relate to affairs from the news or the Torah Portion of the Week or are new insights that suddenly befell him. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, reassure the doubters but make the self-assured doubt more. He strives to bring a fresh perspective rather than bore you with the obvious. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds must be disputed. In short, his main political positions are: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, democracy, anti the fake peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, Science, Free Will, anti blaming-the-victim and for down-to-earth optimism. Read his blog how he attempts to bridge any discrepancies. He admits sometimes exaggerating to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. November 13, 2018, he published his 500th blog post with the ToI. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having a peek outside of your cultural bubble. * To find his earlier blog posts on a certain subject XXX, among his over 1200 ones, go to the right-top corner of the Times of Israel page, click on the search icon and search "zuiden, XXX". His second daily active less tame blog, to which one may subscribe, one may find here: or by clicking on the globe icon next to his picture on top. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me.
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