The Power of Liking over Love!

Throughout history, Love has been praised and adorned. To Fall in Love is supposed to be the ultimate experience of ecstasy, Being in love is offered as a profound goal for reach marriage. There is a worthy alternative to both of these experiences that can cheer the saddest moments and bring light to darkened lives. It is about showing people that you LIKE them, and doing small acts of like in place of LOVE. Love can be an overbearing experience while liking is very handy in almost all situations both the deep and the more superficial.

In the upcoming book, Shortcut to Shalom, we explore the idea of introducing kind. pleasant acts many times each day. these acts show a caring stance from one spouse to another and from one person to another. These acts also create an experience of liking the recipient , and can help a person let go of resentment towards the other. Liking includes politeness, consideration and, acts of caring. politeness is saying polite statements like, ” please, thank you. excuse me, is it possible…” Liking also includes specific praise like you do (such and such) very well. thank you for being so helpful . I think you look nice in that shirt.” Liking also means considering special food and activities someone likes and being willing to create the space to do these things out of thoughtfulness. Liking tells a person, someone knows I am here and values me. This is a heart warming experience.

I am not trying to bash love, however liking is a physical action that shows some happiness in the presence of a person. doing Liking can show a unique response to another person which usually has wonderful repercussions. Love can be fragile sometimes , love can suffer sometimes while liking is easier to keep happening. We can still write poems about love while practicing a more versatile response to creation and the people you care about called showing someone that you like them.

Feel free to send me stories of how you showed this to your partner and Hatzlacha in liking.

About the Author
Chana Rochel Frumin is the founder/director of The Jerusalem Narrative Therapy Institute with over 30 years experience in marital and family counseling in the Jerusalem area.