Benji Lovitt
Because the Middle East is Funny

Top 10 Ways Oscars Would be Different In Israel

10. Instead of the Dolby theater, ceremony held at kibbutz on the way to Ashdod

9. Attendees wear their fancy jeans without the holes

8. Long speeches interrupted by Galgalatz

7. Red carpet ruined after unexpected sponja incident

6. Ceremony takes five hours because Oren Hazan keeps jumping on stage to take selfies

5. Due to budgetary issues, statuettes replaced by Supersol gift cards

4. The “In Memoriam” montage begins with a siren

3. The technical awards are followed by a 10-minute smoke break

2. Ceremony delayed two weeks because the post office lost the envelopes

1. The studio which wins “Best Picture” then has two months to form a coalition

About the Author
Since making aliyah in 2006, Benji Lovitt has performed stand-up comedy and educational programs for groups including Jewish Federations, synagogues, Masa Israel Journey, and Birthright Israel. His perspectives on aliyah and Israeli society have been featured on Israeli TV and radio and in publications such as USA Today, Time Magazine, the BBC, and more. During 2014's Operation Protective Edge, his humorous observations on the war led to his being called in Israel "the only reason to go on Facebook.”
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