Many meat-eaters, when they hear I’m vegan, ask me in astonishment: “But what then do you eat?” That is because they imagine their own diet without animal produce, and indeed: What would be left? A token salad? To make fun of the question, I sometimes answer: “Lettuce, only lettuce. But on Shabbat and Festivals also a carrot.”
Then I tell them that I eat: All roots (like potatoes, carrots, Jerusalem artichoke), all veggies (so many!), grains (so many, and their flour and their cooked or baked produce, pasta), legumes (including peanuts), nuts, fruits, and sea wheat. It turns out that the variety of food that vegans (and vegetarians) eat, by far, exceeds what omnivores consume.
Same thing with single-parent and same-sex parenting.
Surely, it is not good for children to grow up only among men or only among women. Those who claim there’s no basic important difference between the sexes deny the reality that the vast majority of us would not want a partner of either gender. There is a difference between (and importance each of) mothering and fathering. Kids would be best served to have both. Not because all fathers are such, and all mothers are the opposite. But still (call me old-fashioned), there is a difference.
Yet, single-parent and same-sex parents are not as cut-off as most heterosexual couples. Many of the latter raise their brood in isolation from others. And, often, they can be heard saying (when you show any interest in ‘their’ kids): “This is my kid.” This isolation and possessiveness (and an all-suffocating normalcy norm) make that the colorful lifestyle of non-normative families is generally much richer, with always both sexes on deck. When I was raising children alone, I always consulted my rabbi and a female psychologist. Often mothers/fathers of the parent(s) step in, or close friends of both genders help with the parenting. Everywhere, they’ll see heterosexual parents, so they know there are options.
BTW: A similar confusion sits on many Monotheists condemning homosexuality. They imagine themselves having same-sex sex and say: That’s horrible, unnatural. They might be very right — for themselves!
However, for most people who identify as Gay, an other-sex relationship would be an abomination and go against (their) nature.
Empathy is important to understand, value, and love people different from us and to live in peace with them. But sensitivity with those who are unlike us will also help us not to misjudge and needlessly condemn.