Elise Ronan
Justice, justice, you shall pursue....

You don’t have to thank someone for a non-apology

Something is wrong with this generation of activists. They hear antisemitism and what do they do? They demand an apology from the antisemite, not because of the evil they espouse,  but because they “hurt their feelings.”

Now don’t get me wrong. You insult me and I would like an apology. But I am not so naive to think that this is going to change a person, especially if it’s not the first time they have insulted me.

I am also old enough to know when someone is gaslighting me, and when someone is abusive as well. Abusers will always apologize. But they will inevitably return to their abusive nature. The same with antisemites. Sure. The smart ones will apologize when they are caught if political life is important to them. But this does not mean they will ever rethink their worldview.

“Let’s invite the antisemites to dialogue,” say these progressives, even if such a meeting has happened before. Considering that  the miscreant Congresswoman obviously learned absolutely nothing from her previous encounters, what do they think will change this time her views on her antisemitism?  Apparently, it never dawns on these progressives that when the haters agree to dialogue, it does not mean they want to listen to you. In fact, it’s that they want you to listen to them, accept what they say about you, and denounce the fact that you are an “evil Jew.” These “activists” basically allow the haters to set the agenda.

How many times do you have to interact with a person who traffics in virulent antisemitism before you actually tell them to get lost? How many chances did you give a David Duke or Louis Farrakhan? How many chances did you give a GOP representative? So how many chances do you give a progressive law maker? Ask yourself why do you have different antisemitism  rules depending on a person’s political party, skin color, and religion?

Antisemitism is antisemitism. Simply because antisemitism has morphed in the hands of the Left, doesn’t remake the underlying hate any less hateful. Lipstick on a pig doesn’t make the pig a swan.

What do we see these young progressive Jews do in the wake of major offensive actions? We see them thanking the antisemites for finally including them in a movement where Jews were pushed out and  not wanted. We see them say thank you for non-apology apologies. We see them making excuses for those antisemites among their “political friends,” excuses that would cause a meltdown if it came from the other side of the aisle.

And the psychobabble abounds. “We hear you and understand your position.” “We know that you have valid opinions but let me tell you how you hurt my feelings.” “We are so disappointed in your antisemitism and we would like to champion you because identity politics is how we function .”

Antisemites don’t care that they hurt your feelings. They revel in that fact. But still progressives tremble with anticipation that somehow these leftwing antisemites will finally accept their right to exist. Why do progressives give the haters so much power over their lives, their feelings and even their very existence.

Progressives are overwhelmed with joy, when  the leaders of their political party condemn antisemitism. Of course, that is a good thing. But do you really think that these politicians actually care about you beyond their own power? Their job is to teach the antisemitic public neophyte how to play the game to assuage your feelings without really having to change one iota or suffer any consequences.

Ask yourself, after the denunciation by the leadership, is the hater still holding a powerful position?  The leadership’s goal is not to protect you. The leader’s purpose is to protect their power base. And if that base decides that Jews are expendable, then the leadership is going to find a way to manage both, your “feelings,” and their antisemitic voters.

In short, you are being played.

So these young progressives pretend that their party cares about Jewish existence. They give speeches, and write articles, denouncing the right wing antisemites and feel superior and self-righteous about the side of the aisle with whom they align themselves. Refusing to see the growing threat, because someone said “sorry.”

Listen the first time I heard the beginning of this nonsensical talk was years ago when I told my hairdresser I didn’t like the end product. Her response was,”I hear what you are saying and I respect that.” Apart from the fact that it was my hair and she should style it the way I, and not she, liked, the idea that this was somehow a two sided discussion was idiotic.

This is the same with the ridiculousness from so many progressives in today’s day and age. This isn’t a discussion of how we all feel. We don’t need drum circles, playdoh to smash our hurt feelings, and therapy animals for comfort. Those spouting antisemitism need to be excised from public life. They need to be vilified and leadership needs to end their careers now. PERIOD.

I wonder if we should blame ourselves, we, these progressives’ parents.

Maybe it was all the participation trophies they received as children.

Maybe it was that we never taught our children how to stand up for themselves.

Maybe we put too much emphasis on the phrase “if I am ONLY for myself,” instead of the primary statement that “if I am not FOR myself.”

Maybe we mistakenly taught them that there are always 2 sides to every argument.

Maybe we never taught them that to survive against those that would destroy you, you really don’t need to play fair.

About the Author
#RenegadeJew ...Elise's specific background deals with the practical aspects of raising special needs children. She has over 20 years experience advocating for her sons and others. Her motto: Don't put off the important things. Stand up for what you believe in. Do what is right and honest. Have patience. Have self-respect. Be kind. And above all BE BRAVE. Elise is a graduate of Boston University Law School and a Certified College Transition Coach for Persons with Asperger's Syndrome. She blogs under a pen-name to protect her sons' privacy.
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